Our Children - God’s Legacy

So the next generation would know them, even the children yet to be born, and they in turn would tell their children.

Psalm 78:6 (NIV)

We learn very soon in life that we quickly lose control of our children. We cannot control where they live or work. We cannot control where they take our grandchildren. I thought I would be smart. I told my children that I did not care where they lived, but all my grandchildren would live in Denver. That did not work!

Too often we think of leaving our legacy in terms of material wealth. Like so many other areas in our lives, we are probably looking at life differently than God.

In many ways we view our children in the same way we view our relationship with God. We have a tendency to look at what we do instead of who we are. As a result, we look at our success or failure with our children by looking at what they do instead of who they are.

When we read Psalms 78:5-7, God gives us a clear understanding of two things that are critical for establishing His legacy.

He tells us to start teaching our children so that they will teach their children. One of my favorite lines in scripture is in verse 6, “even for children yet to be born.” How many of us are really focusing on what will be taught to those who are not yet born?

A few days ago I read a quote that basically said that we are to hug our children… not just to hug them…but to teach them to hug their children.

The second issue that is critical is what to teach. Too often we focus on their actions or attitudes which make us look good as a parent. Verse 7 gives it to us with simple clarity that is great for us guys. We are to teach our children to teach their children to trust, remember and obey the Living God.

As dads, this is going to require a shift in our thinking and should result in a shift in our actions. We must begin to shape who our children are and encourage their personal relationship with Christ. The focus must not be on simply what they do.

Out of who they are will flow what they do. We have a tendency to try and shape who they are by focusing on changing the things they do. That is why so many of our children act so differently when they leave home. They adjusted their behavior to meet requirements while living in our homes. This is because we told them how to act to get along with us and did not necessarily help them become the person who would bring honor to God.

What will God’s legacy look like as a result of Him trusting you to be the earthly father for His children?

Who Do You Say He Is?

Who Do You Say He Is?
Mathew 16:15

“But what about you?” he asked. “Who do you say I am?”
Mathew 16:15 (NIV)

The question that was posed to Peter by our Lord seemed pretty simple and forthright. It was as if Jesus had heard enough from the intellectual level. I can almost imagine the environment when Jesus listened to all the others. Each of their responses could have been prefaced with “Well the evidence seems to indicate……” then follow that with their conclusions based on what others were saying. “Some say John the Baptist; others Elijah; and still others, Jeremiah or one of the prophets.”

Then Jesus just cut through all the issues with the simple question to Peter. Our Lord’s question could have also have been preceded with ….. “Peter, regardless of the evidence and what others are saying, in your heart…..” Who do you say I am?”

That was the moment of truth. Yet, that same question must be answered by each one of us daily. Our answer will be stated by two separate responses. The first answer will be the words we choose to speak and the second will be shouted louder by how we choose to live our lives. It is one thing to say that Jesus is the Son of the Living God and our Lord and Savior. It is quite another thing to live our lives in such a way that shouts in an undeniable manner that Jesus is the Son of the Living God and our Lord and Savior.

I am convinced that our families, friends and those around us are going to know what we believe about Jesus before we get the chance to tell them what we think about him. They will see in us what we believe long before they hear from us what we think.

Now, here is the problem. For far too many years people around me could not hear what I was saying with my mouth about Jesus because my life was shouting too loudly a message to the contrary.

I believe that I did more to lead people from the Lord rather than to Him.

Now I have this picture that keeps running over and over again. I picture myself standing with Jesus and He is listening to all the answers from the others. Then He turns to me and says, “But what about you?” He asks, “Who do you say I am?”

Before I can answer Him, He says, “Don’t answer that. Let me just watch you today and I will see the real answer.”

So today, when others look at you and see how you choose to live your life……. Who do you say he is?

Do You Remember?

This is another devotional that I wrote for "On the Road"

Do You Remember?

Psalm 78:9-11

They forgot what he had done, the wonders he had shown them.

Psalm 78:11 (NIV)

If you want to look at one of the most incredible reoccurring themes in the Bible, it is the issue of men of God forgetting all that God had done for them. It is very often followed by the phrase, “and again they did evil in the sight of the Lord.”

As men, we have this incredible propensity of “living for the moment.” Yesterday is long gone and tomorrow is out there somewhere. What really counts is today. The problem with that mentality is that we miss so much of the strength that God has intended for us.

We should draw strength from remembering (and remembering often) all that God has done for us. As if salvation was not enough, there is always so much more, for which to be grateful.

God uses the majority of Psalm 78 to remind the Israelites of all that He had done. It also emphasizes that after all of the incredible wonders that He had shown them, they continued to turn their backs on Him.

Today, most of us Christian guys live in a “what have you done for me lately” world often forgetting that God has a long history of loving us more than we can begin to love Him back.

Not only is it important for us to remember all that God has done for us, but it is critical that we pass that history of God’s love on to our children and our children’s children.

When we begin to recall God’s faithfulness, it is important that we do not just focus on the really big blessings, but remember even the smallest of blessings. Equally important is that we remember that God has done all these things out of his incredible love for us.

Our grandchildren love to have us tell them the stories of God’s love and faithfulness in our lives because it also speaks of His love for them since we are family. When God blesses our family, He blesses all of us. They draw strength from a history of blessings.

We tell the stories to remind them of the past so that they can draw strength and know that they can trust God in the future in their own lives.

As you consider your life, have you given thought to what God has done for you; and have you shared that with your family?

If you do not remember, how can they remember?

You Cannot Manage Sin

Several months ago a very good friend of mine, Rick Schatz called and asked me if I would be interested in writing some devotionals for a book to be published for men. I was very honored and thrilled to be a part of a project with some men I have admired for many years. Over the next few days I will share some the devotionals that I wrote. You must also remember that when I speak and write, it is generally something that God is directing at me. The book has recently been released and I think that it is really good. It is titled "On the Road" devotionals for men who travel.

You Cannot Manage Sin

John 5:14

Later Jesus found him at the temple and said to him, “See, you are well again. Stop sinning or something worse may happen to you.”

John 5:14 (NIV)

The phone call is as clear today as it was a few years ago. It was a regular phone check-up with a very close friend to see how he was doing. He had been battling alcoholism for years and had been in and out of different rehab programs.

I asked him how he was doing with the alcohol issue and he responded with the almost normal reply, “Not bad” he said “I seem to be doing better.” Then it hit me…..He was ok with his drinking. He just wanted to get it to an acceptable level. He wanted to get his life right but still be able to drink.

It was one of those incredible wake-up calls for me. My friend was like me and most men. We think that we can beat the problem by working our way out of it. You know -- gradually getting to where we want to be in life.

We think that we can establish acceptable levels of sin that will in some way be pleasing to God.

In doing so it allows us to continue to sin but to a lesser degree so we can report that we are doing better.

So often we like to compare ourselves and our lives with really bad sins so our lives, by comparison, do not look that bad. It is like we are saying, “Come on-- give me a break. I did not kill anyone today.”

We want to ignore the sin as we let our eyes wander and even dwell on ladies inappropriately. We say to ourselves, a little look won’t hurt; after all I am getting better.

We spew out a few curse words but justify it by the heat of the moment; but again, we are getting better. Isn’t that what God wants? Jesus did not tell the man “Go and sin less each day and eventually you will become healed and free from this thing.” He said, “Go and sin no more.”

Sin is sin. God does not give us acceptable levels that are more pleasing to Him that others. There are not degrees of sin which are established by comparison with others to make us feel that we are doing better.

One of the most important steps is to look at our lives and really ask the question, “Where have I established acceptable levels of sin in my life?”

Perhaps it is time to really listen to Jesus when he said, “Stop sinning.” Pray and ask God to show you where you have established “acceptable levels” of sin and ask Him to give you the strength to stop sinning. Start with one area of your life and refuse to believe satan that some sin will be ok today. As a result our progress will then be pleasing to God.

Staying Connected

Yesterday, I made the decision to call a friend just to thank them for investing in me and being a part of my life. The decision to make a call resulted in several. Some were planned and others just happened.
I try to speak at least every other day with each of our two sons who live in other states. In addition, I get to see or speak with our daughter who lives here in Littleton nearly every day. I also connect with Ray Morgan, one of our board members nearly every day for accountability and to do life together.

Here were the three calls that I decided to make yesterday. One was a no-brainer. My youngest sister had a birthday on Monday and I called to wish her a blessed and Happy Birthday. This was important since she and I have shared seasons of stupidity where we let things get in the way of our genuine love for one another. I am trying to strengthen a foundation so that does not happen again.

Secondly, I spoke with a man from California who I met at a couple of men’s events. I did not even have his number and he sent it to me on FaceBook so that I could call. Terry and I have exchanged notes of encouragement over the past year, but there are times when it is important to hear each other’s voice.

In the midst of the day, I received a call from a great friend and brother. He and I had exchanged some emails and knew that we both needed to connect just to “catch-up.” The call with David was overdue for both of us.

Finally, I called a longtime friend just to talk. I had no agenda that prompted the call. My need was to talk with Frank.

Frank Burrows has been “mentoring” me for twenty years. We first met in 1989 when our family moved to Fairfax, VA. Frank and Doris began “investing” in our entire family--not just Frank in my life and Doris in my wife’s but both of them into our sons’ lives as well.

Several years ago when God really began to stir in me regarding men’s ministry, Frank was one of my strongest encouragers. In 1992, we were re-assigned to Rome, Italy. Frank continued to encourage me regarding ministry to men. It was his specific loving prod that helped me take steps to start a small ministry to men and our sons while still in the military. That experience would lead to my seeking out a position with Promise Keepers in 1994 when I retired.

The years with Frank and Doris have had an incredible impact on me. He has a gentle wisdom that can quietly seep through the cracks to reach inside me.

Frank is 82 years old and still more active than men half his age. Yesterday when we spoke, he had already completed his daily routine of exercise followed by leading an exercise class for some “old people”—since he is young. He was very busy because he is also president of the homeowners association.

It had been too long since we last spoke. I am glad I called.

But I wonder..how many are privileged to have a “Frank Burrows” in their lives. It is not too late to find someone.

As a note, in the midst of a few calls, I did get some other work done. It is not an either/or but both.