OneGeneration

A Walk in History

2012-01-16T09:48:00.003-07:00

For me, personally, there is no historical educational experience that is more powerful than walking the exact ground and seeing with my own eyes where history was made.

On January 20, 1997, as our nation was pausing to celebrate and remember the birth of Martin Luther King, Jr., I along with my sons, Chad and Courtney, and Paul Osborne and his son, Josh, had the privilege of walking a part of our nation’s history at the National Civil Rights Museum at the Lorraine Motel in Memphis, TN.

It was a day that two fathers and three sons would not soon forget.

Both Paul and I had told our sons of the events of the assassination of Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr. on April 4, 1968 and what we knew of the civil rights movement.

After a very brief time at the museum, it was all too clear—I really knew very little of the actual civil rights movement and my sons knew less.

Together we listened to speeches of Dr. King and sat on a trolley car similar to the one on which Rosa Parks sat on December 1, 1955 in Montgomery, AL.

For all of us, there was a very emotional moment as we took our turns looking into the motel room where Dr. King was staying until that fateful moment when he stepped out onto the balcony seconds before his life was tragically taken from our nation and the world.

The point of this is not to brag about our trip on that incredible day. It is to suggest that as parents and grandparents, we must preserve the history of our nation. To do so, we should look for teachable moments when we are in a position take advantage of opportunities which afford us the opportunity to take a walk in history with our children and grandchildren.

Another Reason to Love Golf

2011-09-26T16:07:00.005-06:00

On Sunday, a golf match of epic proportion was played. In the end two young golfers who had very few wins on the regular tour battled for the Tour Championship and, oddly enough, the FedEx Cup. The paycheck for the winner was over $11.4 million.

The drama extended beyond the normal 72 holes and required three extra holes to determine the winner.

During the final day, fans witnessed shots go in the cup from over 160 yards out. We saw amazing recoveries from bad shots, including one from the edge of the water.
The part of the story that grabbed me was the generational issue. As the cameras followed the eventual winner, Bill Haas, announcers continued to point out that his dad, mom and wife were cheering for him. In addition, his caddie was his brother, Jay Haas, Jr.

Anyone around golf knows that Bill’s dad is an excellent professional golfer and his younger brother played at the collegiate level. What some may not know is that his dad’s uncle, Bob Goalby won the Master’s in 1968.

One sports writer referred to Bill Haas as “a member of one of the royal families of golf in America.”

Not just a passion for a sport has been passed from one generation to another and then again, another, but a skill set to match the passion.

As I watched dad, son, brother, mother and wife throughout the day, I could not help but wonder what we could do in our own families to connect each generation with a passionate faith that matched and often surpassed that of the previous generation.

Generations to generations - Now that is worth cheering for!

Common Sense: What if one generation bl...

2011-03-07T06:47:00.000-07:00

Common Sense: 

What if one generation bl...: "What if one generation blessed the next? “Where Have the Good Men Gone?” created quite a stir when Kay Hymowitz posed the ques..."

Why I am Passionate about Ministry to Men

2011-01-20T12:46:00.002-07:00

The Following blog rated as one of the most read last year. the events since that time only serve to reinforce what I wrote nearly one year ago. I want to also encourage men to invest in themselves by attending trainings for men. These include, but are not limited to, denominational events, Iron Sharpens Iron Conferences, Man in the Mirror Annual Summit, Dangerous Man Conferences, Men of Valor Conferences and so many others.

FROM MARCH 2010
Last weekend I had the privilege of speaking to nearly 700 men as a part of the speaking team at the Iron Sharpens Iron conference in Rockford, IL. Roy Abbott and his team at Focal Point Ministries did a tremendous job of sponsoring/hosting this event.

For me to speak at this event, I spent a few hours on the road to and from the airport in Denver. I spent time in the airport waiting for flights or to get my bags. I spent nearly a total of three hours on a bus between Chicago and Rockford. It was not just me, by the way--many of the speakers/workshop leaders did the same thing. Here is the point. Lots of hours invested in this by many many men so that we could come together and build ourselves as well as other men. My close friends and brothers, Ray Morgan, Ken Larson, Dan Erickson and Sam Mehaffie had similar travel schedules to be there and invest in men.

So Why???

Here is a glimpse of my last four days from just one small perspective.

1. FRIDAY AFTERNOON: The young lady at the Information Desk was divorced because her husband had left her for another woman. As a note, he was divorcing that person now and had called her to see if this young lady would take him back. The young lady said that men these days are just weak and looking for a "Sugar Mama" to take care of them.

2. FRIDAY NIGHT: Our server was a great young lady. She was raising two children, ages 2 and 5 on her own. We prayed with her.

3. SUNDAY AFTERNOON: Our server when asked if we could pray for her, asked for prayer for her "ex" boyfriend. She said that he just needed help being a man and finding himself.

4. MONDAY LUNCH: My wife and I had lunch together and asked our server if we could pray for her. Without any hesitation she said yes and when asked if there is anything specific, she asked if we would pray for her family. She shared that her father had left her family about four years ago and they were still struggling, especially her two little brothers.

Here is my take on this-- we need stronger men. Ladies of all ages deserve much better than they are getting. Is this an indictment on all men in the land. Absolutely not!! I am meeting with guys across the land who are working hard to be the men God created us to be.

I am suggesting that there is still a great deal of work to be done.

So why do I do what I do and why does my bride of nearly 32 years support me beyond anything that would seem reasonable to others?? We have three of the most amazing Granddaughters (and who knows how many more in the future). They are being raised to be strong Godly ladies. I am working to see if we cannot help to raise some strong Godly men who will raise their sons or grandsons to be the kind of Godly men my granddaughters deserve.

Our families, churches, communities and our nation all need and deserve strong Godly Men.

That is why I am passionate about ministry to men and why I am heading to Springfield, IL this weekend.

Integrity in Prayer

2011-01-19T03:00:00.000-07:00

A few days ago, I posted the following on my Facebook/Twitter update:

“ ‘Rep. Gabrielle Giffords' condition has been upgraded from critical to serious, the University of Arizona Medical Center said Sunday.’ Does not matter your politics, people who actually pray, should be praying for Rep Giffords.”

Someone asked what I meant by the statement regarding “people who actually pray”? The answer for me was very simple. I do not think nearly as many people who say they will pray or who say that they are responding to prayer needs, actually pray.

Frankly, I feel that there is far too much on the social networks that begin with “Dear God” that is not intended to be a prayer or even honoring to God. Instead, it is closer to just slapping God in the face and in many cases might be much closer to blasphemy than prayer. When the post begins with “Dear God,” consider if the next words could be, “Hallowed be Thy Name.”

I think that for many people it has become one of those “in vogue” things to post updates that indicate that they are praying when in fact they are not.

It is my belief that this is having the effect of creating cultural Christians who talk about prayer but do not actually stop and pray. As a result are teaching our children and younger Christians that we can just talk about prayer but not really engage in the process.

I am wondering how many children hear their parents tell someone that they will pray but never see or hear their parents pray? My guess is far too many!!

One of the most powerful acts of faith that we have is prayer.

It can be very powerful for our children and grandchildren to be a part of the prayer we promised. It teaches them to pray and it also shows integrity in our word.

Here is my bottom line for parents: when you tell someone in the presence of your children that you will pray, include your children when you pray.

A Walk in History

2011-01-17T14:01:00.004-07:00

Everyone Has Something to Offer Repost from Jan 2010

2011-01-15T09:53:00.002-07:00

This is a repost of my blog from January, 2010. It was rated one of the favorites of last year. On my wall in front of my work area, I have an old picture of me and my friend/mentor, Dr. Gary Sallquist. Each time I look at the picture of us, I am reminded of a great leadership principle that Gary champions.

Nearly 40 years ago my good friend and mentor, Dr Gary Sallquist, gave me a book. It was one of several he gave me and encouraged me to read. Gary may not remember giving me the book or that I still have it held together by a rubber band.

The book titled, Excellence, by John W. Gardner was first published in 1961; and my paperback version was printed in 1971. By the way, the price on the book is $.95.

One of my favorite stories of understanding leadership and identifying leaders comes from the tattered pages of this old book.

“There are many varieties of excellence. This is one of those absurdly obvious truths of which we must continually remind ourselves. The Duke of Wellington, in a famous incident, revealed an enviable understanding of it. The government was considering a dispatch of an expedition to Burma to take Rangoon. The Cabinet summoned Wellington and asked him who would be the ablest general to head such an undertaking. He said, “Send Lord Combermere.” The government official protested: “but we have always understood that your Grace thought Lord Combermere a fool.” The Duke’s response was vigorous and to the point. “So he is a fool, and a damned fool, but he can take Rangoon.”

All too often, many of us miss talent and gifting in people because we cannot get by their appearance or personality to see what they have to offer. This is certainly true when it comes to trying to achieve an intergenerational community, whether at church or the workplace.

It is not limited to older looking at younger. It also prevents younger from seeing the value of a more seasoned age-group. In addition, this disease can keep those in the middle from wanting to be around older or younger.

Many churches and organizations are failing to connect with incredible young men and women, as well as phenomenal older men and women who have so much to offer “The Body” because we think we have to like someone for them to be a contributor. The “talent drain” in most churches is one of the most destructive inhibitors to growth.

Gardner makes the following statement in his chapter, The Great Talent Hunt”:

“…all who care about excellence in a society must be vigilant concerning the waste of talent. Teachers, curators, deans, critics, art dealers, editors, foundation officers, publishers—in short, all who are in a position to encourage talent—should continuously ask themselves whether the society is providing sufficient opportunities for its varied resources of talent. If important kinds of talent are withering on the vine, they had better know why.”

We could easily exchange the “church” for the word “society” in Gardner’s statement.

Are our churches missing a wealth of talent in all age groups because we cannot get past personality and appearance to see that everyone has something to offer?

I believe that one of the characteristics of great intergenerational churches will be that everyone gets to serve and be served. We all bring something to the table that is valuable and needed.

Leaders need to know who can “take Rangoon” regardless of their personality or appearance.

Paraphrasing the previous words of John Gardner, “If important kinds of talent and leadership in all age groups are withering on the vine in our churches or just leaving because they do not feel they have a place to grow, leaders had better know why and be willing to change.”

Gardner, John W., Excellence, Perennial Library, Harper & Row, Publishers, 1971, p. 151, 52

InterGenerational Worship

2011-01-14T03:00:00.000-07:00

As I study the issues of the generations, I feel that very often we have a tendency to put an “either/or” where God probably puts an “and.”

Over the years I have sadly listened to older Christians speak that there are just not enough of the old hymns sang at their church. I have listened to younger church crowds talk about how they need their own worship and do music their way

When did the music of any generation become just theirs and all about only them?

Several years ago, I had a conversation with a music teacher at a Christian college. She was saddened by the fact she could not get her students interested in the old beautiful hymns. I asked her if she had ever told the stories of the songs before she taught the music. She had not.

She also told me that she had a tough time with the songs of today – specifically, the singing of the same chorus many—too many—times for her liking. I asked her about several songs and if she knew the stories behind the writing of the song. She did not.

I challenged her to teach the stories and then teach the music.

This is also true at any church around the world. We can transcend the age separations by learning the stories behind each of the songs from the different generations.

Here is a two-part challenge—Teach the story of Horatio Spafford and why he wrote, It is Well With My Soul, in 1873. Then teach the story of Matt Redman and why he wrote, The Heart of Worship, in 1997.

There are so many stories to be told and songs to be sang. Yes, the music is important. I think that it is clearly accepted that God loves music and worship. I think that God loves us to worship together -- lifting up our voices as OneGeneration, One Family.

It is not either this style of music or that one. Perhaps for the family, it is this style of music and that one.

Accepting the Absurd as Normal

2011-01-13T03:30:00.000-07:00

Have you ever looked at something and thought, "That is just not right?" Sometimes events happen so fast and come so unexpected that we do not know how to react. When the moment has passed, we know in our hearts that what just happened was wrong but we feel trapped and unable to reverse the situation.

I clearly remember the Sunday that this next event took place. Our sons were in middle school/junior high; and as we walked into the church, Chad told me that the youth group had all decided to sit together and he and Courtney would meet us after church.

It happened so fast and they were both on the other side of the church with all their friends. I thought about this all week and did not correct the situation. I was not sure why I felt that I had just missed something. The following week the same thing happened with no announcement.

During the next week, I realized why I felt the way I did and I knew that I had to make a decision. During the week Billie and I sat the guys down and simply explained to them that Sunday was family and church time. I did men’s ministry and Billie did women's ministry, but we did not sit as a group on Sunday. Sunday is family time.

The immediate response from the guys was that there were some of the friends whose parents did not come to church and they would be alone. I thought for a moment and told our sons to bring their friends with them and they could also sit with us as a family. I would be their “daddy.”

Several years after this incident, I was in the process of writing Men of Honor Women of Virtue and my editor read a simple statement I wrote regarding how we fall into traps and accept abnormal for normal. She immediately responded and asked me to expand on the subject. In her words she stated that trading the absurd for normal was a significant problem.

It is important to understand that doing things many times does not really make them normal or right.

We have done so many crazy things in the church to divide everyone by age, gender or special need. We seem to have forgotten at times the difference between ministries of the church and church itself.

How many times must we repeat absurd things before we start seeing them as normal?

This is important to remember in our churches and families—absurd actions are still absurd actions no matter how many times we do them.

Continually separating our churches by age, gender and special needs is absurd. Just because we have done this for years, does not make it normal.

Here is Someone You Need to Meet

2011-01-12T05:00:00.001-07:00

Very often I have heard older seasoned men and women of the church make a statement that indicates they feel they have nothing to offer younger people. That is a great tragedy in so many ways.

I heard a radio commentator announce that a study had shown that in the average lifetime a person will come into contact with over 10,000 people. Not sure how true his numbers or findings were, but I am convinced that we all know a lot of people. The older you get, the longer the list should be.

One of the greatest gifts that anyone of any age can give to another person is to listen to them, understand their needs and then connect them with another person who might have the skills or capabilities to help.

I have felt on many occasions that one of the things that I feel I do best is connect good people and then get out of the way and let God be God. Frankly, I love connecting people and then hearing later that some very significant things are happening and my name is not mentioned in any way.

Regardless of our ages, we have contacts. One of the greatest gifts we can give to someone is an introduction to another person who might be able to help them much better than we are capable.

Think of three people you know and ask yourself if there is anyone you should introduce to them.

These are powerful words to remember and use often—“Please allow me introduce you. This is someone you need to meet.”

Not Your Grandmothers Church

2011-01-11T13:09:00.002-07:00

Several years ago I walked into a friend’s office and he handed me a post card he had received the previous week and asked me what I thought. The card had been mailed to residents inviting them to a new church that was being planted in the area.

As I looked at the card, I actually felt anger and then sorrow. The front of the card had a picture of an elderly lady with her face contorted in a very unattractive manner. Above her picture were the words, “This is not your grandmother’s church.”

It took me a few minutes to process all that I was feeling at the time. I am sure the new church was well-intended. Yet, it did not excuse the leadership from sending out a very degrading postcard as an invitation to a new church that apparently would not be filled with a bunch of old people to drag it down.

I must confess that I did have this fleeting thought to find the leadership of this new church and grab them tightly as I asked them several questions. Questions like—“Who do you think built this city?” Who do think built the schools, businesses, libraries and hospitals?” Who do you think fought for freedom around the world in places you cannot even pronounce?” and “Who do you think wants to see this community filled with great churches just as much as you do?”

Sadly, in many churches it has become a church only for a part of God’s family.

I realized that in a sense the new church was right. We do not want a “Grandmothers or Grandfathers Church.” I do not want a church with teens or only college age.

Church should include grandmothers, teens, college-age, children and every age group in the community. Church was designed by God to function as a family. It seems that God intended for all of us to do life together.

So to the young leadership team that sent the cards to an entire neighborhood—I hope that your church is not just your grandmother’s church. But, I also hope you have some grandmothers and grandfathers in the church or you will miss a significant blessing from God.

Who Are the Real Greeters at Your Church?

2011-01-10T08:54:00.003-07:00

I have the privilege of speaking in many different churches in any given year. It is a great blessing and time of learning for me. One of the health indicators of a church that I look at is the demographics of who speaks to me while I am at the church.

In my home church of Grace Community Church in Centennial, Colorado, I am spoiled. I do not go a Sunday without some absolutely amazing friends hunting me down for a hug or to say something encouraging to me. This group is far from what you would call my peers. It starts as young as Sierra and Jacob who are 6 and 4.We have been buddies for almost four years. The group includes Sam, Paul and Gracie who are in college, high school and grade school. On the other end of the spectrum are Dale and Velma and Neal and Joy. In between is virtually every age-group in the church and they are my church family. I think it is a vital sign of the health of Grace.

Regularly, I study the demographics of who speaks to me during my time in churches where I am given the opportunity to speak or teach. It is a great indicator of the overall health of nearly every church family.

Yesterday, Evergreen Christian Community provided a good look at the health of the church family. The age range of the men and women who spoke directly to me was incredible. Mr. Joel will turn 98 this week. He specifically stopped to introduce himself and thank me for being at the church. On the lower end of the age range a young guy who I think was about 6 walked up and just said “Hi.” It was clear that he knew this was his church and he felt it important to be sure that I knew it as well. The age range of both the men and women were between Mr. Joel and the young man.

There are several reasons why this is important.

First, it indicates what I call “home ownership.” The members of the church family feel that this is their home, and they want guests to feel comfortable in the same way a person would walk into their house.

Second, it indicates that they feel part of the team. It is not only the greeter’s responsibility to greet but also the church family and, as part of the church, they greet.

Third, the age range indicates an intergenerational environment that is extremely healthy. It speaks volumes about the authority and responsibility felt by each person for “their” church.

This is true of any church. When you have guests, stand back and observe who speaks to them in your church. Is it only the designated ones who are obligated to say something to them; or do you see men, women, young adults and children of every age engage them because they want them to feel comfortable in their house? Who are the true greeters at your church?

Who Will Be Better Because of You?

2011-01-07T04:00:00.001-07:00

The first of a New Year is always a time for resolutions. Everyone makes them because we feel that a New Year is a great time to make needed changes. It is a natural starting point. Who feels the magic in launching life change on September 23rd or February 17th for example? There is just something about January 1 of any year that has a special feeling.

In the many years I have talked with men and women about their resolutions, I have noticed a pattern. Most of us make resolutions or set goals based on where we feel the need to improve, personally.

Leaders—I mean real leaders have a tendency to set goals based on where they want to help others grow.

Here is a method to evaluate your goals from a leadership perspective. Look at each one of your resolutions or goals and imagine them achieved. Now ask the question, “Who is going to be better because of you achieving your goals?”

I do not mean better as in having more things. Who is going to be closer to their personal goals? For clarity, I do not mean that if dads make more money, their kids can have more toys and their wife can get her hair done more often.

How do your goals help another person become a better person?

Take another look at your resolutions.

Who do you intend to take with you?

Who Will Be Better Because of You?

My 2011 Reading List for Starters

2011-01-06T05:00:00.000-07:00

Regularly I am asked what I am reading. Here is a look at what is on the list for the start of 2011. The easiest way to get a chapter to download is to “google” the title.

Holy Bible – I carry the NIV (large Print) and have NKJV and NAS at my reading morning place. Also I rely on Logos significantly.

Devotional – Streams in the Desert by L. B. Cowman, edited by Jim Reimann. This is the same devotional I used last year and I enjoy using the same one for several years. Seem to get more out of it each year.

Books

Men of Honor Women of Virtue, Chuck Stecker, 2010, Seismic Publishing Group. I am re-reading what I wrote. It is not an ego trip but I did a lot of research for this book and I am refreshing to keep myself fresh – if that makes sense. Looking forward to developing a 5 hour seminar on The Power of Rites of Passage during the early part of 2011 and this book will be our source.
Follow me on Facebook @ http://www.facebook.com/ChuckStecker
Twitter @ http://twitter.com/#!/ChuckStecker

Generation iY, Tim Elmore, 2010, Poet Gardener Publishing – Tim Elmore has been part of a significant movement to reach the younger generation with more than loud music and parties. He has always been a man of substance and clarity. I am anxious to get to this one.
Follow Tim on Facebook @ http://www.facebook.com/tim.elmore
Twitter @ http://twitter.com/#!/TimElmore

Baby Boomers and Beyond, by Amy Hanson, 2010, Jossey-Bass, A Leadership Network Publication – Amy is a remarkable lady who I had the privilege of meeting at the CASA Network conference a few months ago in Atlanta. Her subtitle is “Tapping the Ministry Talents and Passions of Adults over 50.” If you go to Amy’s Website and look at the categories of her blog--one is “Intergenerational Ministry”
Follow Amy on http://amyhanson.org/

Generations, William Strauss & Neil Howe, 1991, Harper Perennial. This is a foundational book to the study of generations. I have perused this book in the past and gleaned key information. The subtitle is “The History of America’s Future, 1584 to 2069." It is filled with great research and is not a weekend read.

Generation Me, Jean M. Twenge, Ph.D., 2006, Free Press a Division of Simon & Shuster Inc. I know very little about this book or the author. It came on a search regarding generational study. The subtitle is “Why Today’s Young Americans Are More Confident, Assertive, Entitled-and More Miserable than Ever Before."

MOJO, Marshall Goldsmith, 2009, Hyperion Books. This book was given to me by Pastor David Wiggington when we were both speakers near Vienna, Austria last year. In a very short time I realized that David was a guy who I really liked being around and loved to hear him speak. Therefore if he thought enough of the book to give and recommend it, that was good enough for me.

Soulprint: Discovering Your Divine Destiny, Mark Batterson, 2011, Multnomah Books. I have read Primal and Wild Goose Chase by Mark Batterson. I have looked forward to this book and I am excited. It is scheduled for release on January 18, 2011.

Biography I also want to read at least two biographies and I am deciding which ones I will choose.

This is a start for 2011. There are so many good books and resources. Happy reading.

Vantage Point

2011-01-05T03:00:00.000-07:00

One of my favorite movies to help us understand InterGenerational strategies is “Vantage Point.” Released in 2006 by Sony Pictures, the movie is based on an incident in Spain and is relived through the eyes of eight strangers who all had perfect views of the assassination.

In each of their views there was part of the truth that was only seen clearly when pieced together with the views of the other seven.

Isn’t that today’s church? We see everything in church from our own vantage point. What we see is often not the entire truth, but a part of the total truth. The actual truth cannot be determined until the view of each person is woven together with the others.

When it comes to the key issues of InterGenerational Ministry, they are often seen from the vantage point of the each person.

We often try to make things far more difficult than they need to be.

We are starting a new year. It is a great time for change and trying something new.

Let me ask you a simple question; where do you generally sit for the weekend worship service at your church? I mean actually sit! Most people go to the same service and sit in the same general area, if not the same exact seats. Seating in many churches is similar to season ticket holders for sports. They choose their seat and then everyone else, including the new folks you might be trying to reach, fills in around them.

One of the easiest things a church family can do to begin to grasp the idea of an InterGenerational church is to attend a different service--if you attend the same service, sit in a different seat. I am not saying one row over--I am saying the other side of the church. If you are a front sitter, move to the back on the other side.

In short, see things from a different vantage point and shake hands with different families.

Churches often plan a large program and invest significant resources to do something that can be as simple as some of us in our 60’s who are thought to be “unmovable” from our sacred seats moving and sitting next to a family in their 30’s. If you really want to be radical, try sitting with the teens or college age.

If you truly want to move towards an intergenerational community, try looking at things in your church from a different vantage point.

If you are willing to do this simple act, drop me a note next week and let me know what you saw from your new vantage point.

Another Change of Command

2011-01-03T17:17:00.002-07:00

Having served nearly 23 years in the United States Army, I am somewhat familiar with “Change of Commands.” These ceremonies in the military are significant events. The Ceremonies are normally marked by the outgoing commander handing the unit flag or “guidon” to their senior commander who in turn hands it to the new commander.

In a similar way, there are changes in command in churches as well. The difficulty in churches is that rarely does the outgoing pastor hand the symbol of leadership to the incoming pastor. Churches normally go through a period where the board or an interim pastor has the leadership responsibility.

My home church, Grace Community Church (GCC) in Centennial, CO, is undergoing a change of command. For the past 7 years our Senior Pastor has been Jim Ladd. This is a difficult time because Jim has become more than my Senior Pastor. He is my friend, brother, fellow warrior in the battle and a trusted confidant.

As Jim and Sue head to their next assignment, I want to share some observations I have from Jim’s tenure as my commander.

1. Integrity: Unwavering integrity that never once was in question. His word was his word and it was based on HIS word.

2. Leadership Development: From the very beginning, Jim invested in men and women of all ages, sizes, colors and shapes. The leadership team at GCC is stronger that it has ever been and the list of leaders ready to go is continuing to grow.

3. Intergenerational Intentionality: All ages are important to Jim because I feel that Jim believes all ages are important to God. He has worked very hard to build up ministry to the entire church and not build a church on a single age group.

4. Tackled the Tough Issues: Jim was never afraid or reticent to take on the tough issues and take full responsibility for the decisions.

5. “The Counsel of Many”: This is the actual title of a book by another of my mentors and close friends, Dr Gary A. Sallquist. It applies to Jim in that he was never slow to seek solid counsel from his advisors. You never had the impression that Jim felt he had all the answers. You did know that he felt fully responsible for the answer and always sought counsel.

In the military, I said goodbye to many great commanders. While it was difficult to see them leave, it was always with great joy when they were being recognized and promoted or they were being sent to an assignment of greater responsibility.

That is the case for me now. I am pained by the loss of Jim and Sue from our Grace family. Yet I am overjoyed by seeing them make a move that has God’s fingerprints all over it.

Jim, you are leaving a church that is much stronger than the one of which you took command over seven years ago. We are all better prepared and positioned to serve the Lord and build His Kingdom because of you.

Thank you for being my pastor, friend and fellow warrior.

Peeling the Onion

2010-12-15T09:56:00.006-07:00

Some receive our ACG Newsletter but other readers of my blog do not so I added this article. If you would like to receive the newsletters go to the ACG website at www.achosengeneration.org

Several years ago a person made a comment to me regarding the “vision” that I had given their pastor. My ego wanted to pat myself on the back and tell me what a great job I had done serving the Lord. It seemed only to be nano-seconds before God awoke me from my self-indulgent dream.

Before I could even thank the person for the intended compliment, I said to the person, “I never gave your pastor a vision.” I went on to explain that the vision for the “InterGenerational church” was planted in the pastor’s heart by God and I was given the privilege of “peeling the onion.”

When that was said, the person had a perplexed look on their face. I went on to tell them that what brought me to the church was the trust of the pastor because he knew in his spirit that I shared the same vision that God had given him.

I have come to realize that God has trusted A Chosen Generation with a clear understanding of vocabulary, definitions and strategies for the restoring of the InterGenerational Church.

There is a part of that trust and favor for this message that can be paralyzing or empowering. With God’s trust comes enormous responsibility. I have chosen to be empowered.

God has allowed ACG to help some incredible pastors “peel the onion.”

When God entrusted A Chosen Generation with a message for the InterGenerational Church, He also gave me some very clear guiding principles that I have worked hard to follow from the very first day.

1. Never hold a pastor hostage. Having spent a couple of days in Special Operations during my 23 years of military service I thought I understood “Hostage” but it took me time to understand what God was telling me. Over time I understood God to mean that if we withheld truths, training, equipping and resources that God has given ACG from Pastors, we would hold pastors hostage to this ministry and that was never God’s intention.

2. Never out price the small church. This has been foundational from the very beginning. I believe that God desperately loves the small church and sees it as just as important as any “mega-church.” The reality is that much of what God has given ACG is best implemented in smaller churches that best represent family. That is not to say that we cannot help larger churches. It is merely to say, “If it is of God and good for His church, it should be good for ALL His churches.”

3. Be open and operate with integrity. We have worked very hard to be open, honest and with full integrity.

In the 20/20 Vision for His Vision for 2020, it is very clear that it will require resources. We must shift from doing the ministry to training others and trusting them to carry the message. We must lock arms with many other organizations and ministries. This will require us to travel and attend conferences and meetings that are expenses and not direct revenue producing. Over time we will be able to see these types of events and training as investments for ACG and the churches we serve.

From the very beginning, I have known that God is our provider, not men or churches. His resourcing of A Chosen Generation will come through faithful churches as well as men, women and families who are obedient to God’s nudging. God is going to use the obedience of many others who He has trusted with Kingdom Resources to resource A Chosen Generation.

In the past, I believe that I have lacked boldness to talk about money or resources. I have no good reason for that except to say that I believe the work God has entrusted to A Chosen Generation is Kingdom work and can be part of God’s greater plan of raising up “World Changers.”

It is critically important for everyone to know that I am not asking you for just financial support. I am inviting you to join A Chosen Generation on an incredible journey; a journey that in the next ten years will reach over 5 million people with message, strategies and resources to restore the InterGenerational church in His Kingdom. We are devoting our energy to helping pastors “peel the onion” of a vision that God has to them.

I am inviting you to become part of something that in 10 years you can look back and tell your children and grandchildren, “I was obedient and God let me be a part of something amazing.”

My prayer is not that you will donate to ACG. My prayer is that you will earnestly pray, seek God’s heart and then to be obedient to what He tells you.

InterGenerational Traditions

2010-12-09T16:16:00.004-07:00

Have you ever given thought to how traditions were established? It the simplest of answers, traditions have been established because they were done the first time and someone realized it was good and wanted to do it again and continued through the years.

Several years ago, we did something that has become one of our family traditions. We had gone to Christmas Eve services and then everyone came to our house and we just did “family.” Our Christmas Eve dinner has been clam chowder, shrimp (and lobster for the daughter who claims she does not like shrimp) and snacks. We all wrap gifts, play games and enjoy being with one another. Everyone spends the night together at our home.

Then our daughter, Lauri, added a twist. Everyone was allowed to open a present. It happened to be a present of her choosing. Each one of us opened our gift which was new PJ’s. One by one we each went and changed into our new pajamas. Now, out of our “church” clothes and with a fire blazing in the fireplace, we settle in to just have “family time.”

The picture is dark and of the fireplace with stockings hung. For some odd reason, no one in our family would allow me to post a picture of all of us in our pajamas.

Now with our family spread out and each with extended families, our Christmas Eve tradition happens on the even-numbered years and the week after Christmas on the odd-numbered years.

I am not sure that our oldest granddaughters, Ellie and Hannah, can remember a Christmas without new pajamas and the whole family enjoying being with one another. Now we add Makayla and Liam to the mix and I hope they will always remember Christmas that includes the family and new pajamas.

InterGenerational churches must be built on InterGenerational families; families who do life together and create their own traditions.

If your kids and/or grandkids were asked if your family has any Christmas traditions, what would their answer be and what do you want their answers to be?

A Vision for InterGenerational or Just a Slogan

2010-12-08T11:11:00.003-07:00

Very often I am with leaders who talk about “InterGenerational” ministry as if it is already happening in a powerful way in their church or organization.

Many times, a closer look reveals that InterGenerational ministry is being given “lip service.” The term is being woven into messages and documents as if that is all that is required. The problem is that many churches appear to believe that InterGenerational ministry can be accomplished by a slogan or including the word in a mission or vision statement.

When InterGenerational is left to a slogan or vision statement and there is no clear strategy to accomplish goals or implement actions, it does not take very long for most of the people to see “the Emperor has no clothes.”

The Holiday Season is a very important time for churches and families. It is a season where the church has an incredible opportunity to bring families closer together and not farther apart.

It is not too late for this year!!

I want to suggest that as churches and families, we look carefully at the activities of the season. I think that we can divide activities into three basic groups.

1. Family activities where we all do something together. We must be sure that we
intentionally plan these types of activities- - games, caroling, events.

2. Activities where one part of the family watches another part of the family do
something. This can be a part of the evening. Things such as children’s Christmas programs can be followed by some family time.

3. Activities where one part of the family does things separate from the rest of the
family. Small Group parties that do not include our children are a good example. Also, time for mom and dad to have a dinner alone is very important.

Like a good diet, our spiritual life must have balance. I like pizza, but not for every meal. I want to do things with my children and my grandchildren. I also want some time with friends and with only my wife.

Churches should take a close look at the diet they are presenting to the church family. There should be balance there as well.

One of the things that my home church does regularly is the shaping of Communion to be a family time. Often we are given the elements and told to hold them and gather with our family. That simply act draws our family closer together.

If we do not look at our activities at this time, InterGenerational can become just a slogan.

Vision – To Dream by Day

2010-11-29T16:17:00.002-07:00

Over this past weekend, I read a great amount on visions and dreams. It seems that many characterize dreaming as that done only at night. Visions are given during the daylight hours.

I love the quote by Edgar Allan Poe in “Eleonora.” “Those who dream by day are cognizant of many things which escape those who dream only by night.”

I have translated the real meaning of the quote to state, “Beware of those who dream by day, for they are the truly dangerous ones.”

Some may call it a vision, but I have asked God to allow me to sit in His presence and “dream by day.” When one truly understands the implications of this, it can never be confused with “day dreaming.”

I have come away from this weekend with a different twist on this idea. It all came down to a very significant thought – at least significant to me:

Do I live a life that God can trust with His dreams by day?

Paul tells us in Ephesians 4:1, “As a prisoner for the Lord, then, I urge you to live a life worthy of the calling you have received.”

Here is the bottom line -- during the rest of this year, I am going to use this blog and our newsletter, OneGeneration to share the vision or my dreams by day.

The theme for the vision for the next 10 years for A Chosen Generation is
“20/20 Vision for His Vision for 2020”

If you do not receive OneGeneration, the newsletter of A Chosen Generation, you should go to our website at www.achosengeneration.org; and there is a link on the home page where you can sign up for the emails.

All I can tell you is to get ready. I am more excited about the next 10 years than I have been about any other time in my life.

Be seated and make sure that your seatbelt is tight across your lap, your seatback and tray table are in the upright and locked position. Please turn off all electronic devices and focus. We are ready for takeoff and I hope you are as well. This is going to be a great ride.

Get ready to dream by day.

Satan’s Worst Nightmare

2010-09-13T16:41:00.001-06:00

I am in an incredible battle and in many ways I love it. In every area of my life there seems to be a fierce battle. How cool is that!!! To be under attack is for me an indicator that I am doing some things that upset the evil one. In addition, I think that men in particular were created to be in a battle. We were created to be warriors.

Consider this with me - - Genesis 1:27 “So God created man in His own image….” Then Genesis 1:28 “Be fruitful and multiply….” The question should not be multiply what? Exodus 15:3 “The Lord is a Warrior; the Lord is His name.” If we are in His image and He is a warrior, then by real simple deduction, we are created to be warriors.

Frogs reproduce frogs. Trees reproduce trees. Cowards reproduce cowards and warriors were designed to reproduce warriors.

I am not in a battle just because, as depicted in some far-fetched movies, the gods are just having fun watching. First of all there are no gods. There is one God.

The battles rage because there is sin and we are to battle what is right and of God.

I am in this battle for three reasons:

1. To be victorious for God.
2. To train another generation to fight and be victorious when everything in them does not believe it is possible.
3. To be satan’s worst nightmare and make his life miserable.

Some have asked me if I really believe that I can be satan’s worst nightmare. I am believing the answer is yes.

When satan goes to bed tonight, I want him to check under his bed and look in his closet to see if I am there. When satan hears a noise tonight, I want him to be afraid and get up to see if it is me. When satan hears my feet hit the floor in the morning, I want him to say/think, “Oh crap, he’s up.”

I believe that InterGenerational means being the warrior God created me to be and helping another man be the warrior he was created to be - - for God’s glory.

InterGenerational Takes Effort And Intentionality

2010-09-09T08:09:00.003-06:00

When was the last time you thought about the age range of your relationships? I am not referring to people who you see or come into contact with during your activities such as church or at your kid’s school.

Think about who you intentionally schedule on your calendar. Do not consider your children or co-workers you see only at work.

Think about the people you pursue and the ones who pursue you to have coffee or lunch.

Pictured with me is Brandon Chrisp. We met over three years ago when he was a student at Denver Seminary. We began in a structured mentoring program. Now I guess you could say, we meet because we are just really good friends.

Several years ago, I listened to Dr Gordon McDonald at Denver Seminary. At one point he was asked a very pointed question. The questioning individual asked Dr McDonald about the biggest difference in his life now compared to when he was much younger. Without hesitation, Dr McDonald responded that it was the men in his life.

The answer to the follow-up question was very significant. He was asked, “How did you find those men?” He responded, “Just like I got my wife, Gail. I dated them.”

Dr. McDonald went on to explain that when he realized the void in his life, he first decided what type of men he needed. Then he made a list of guys he already knew. Then he began to ask them to meet for coffee. No agenda except to see if they wanted to meet again.

Dr. Mc Donald was clear. Some guys were good men but they did not make “the cut.” Others he continued to meet with and in time he found that he had an amazing group of men surrounding him.

Frankly, if you do not have others in your life, you are most likely not putting forth the effort. If you do not have younger and older people in your life, you are most likely not putting forth the effort.

If you do not have true friends and relationships beyond your age group, you should ask yourself:

1. Am I actually available to others?
2. Do I intentionally pursue others?
3. Am I willing to invest in someone else?

We must make a decision to be intentional about the relationships in our lives. We are intentional about things that we value. If we truly value and desire relationships that go beyond our own age-range, we must be available and intentional.

Always Two Questions

2010-09-02T12:02:00.004-06:00

There are two questions that are asked of me at most Rites of Passage. The first is, “Where was this for my older children?” That is normally followed by the statement, “Maybe they would still be in church if we would have done this for them.”

The second question seems to be more sensitive to the person asking. It is, “Where was this for me?”

These are not easy questions to answer, except to say that we are trying to (re)capture something that is “of God” and so needed in our churches today. It is not just about a spiritual blessing. It is also an issue of speaking truth - - truth about who and whose we are.

Far too many Christians have never been told that they are loved because of who they are and not what they do. Blessings counter the lies and deceptions of satan.

A significant dynamic that we see at Rites of Passage weekends is the high number of men and women of all ages who come forward to receive a Father’s Blessing. I have witnessed men and women in their 80’s kneel to be blessed.

Afterwords, many have told me that they have known for years that “something was missing” but they just did not know what it was until that night.

I believe that churches must focus on being families that bless one another.

Clearly a foundational work on this subject is The Blessing by Gary Smalley and John Trent. One of my favorites is Rolf Garborg’s book The Family Blessing.

Blessings change life and help shape our destiny. No one in God’s family should ever wonder if they have been blessed.

Here is a question for readers - - When did you receive a Father’s blessing? Leave a comment. I would love to hear from you.

A Must for All Leaders

2010-08-24T09:13:00.000-06:00

John W. Gardner wrote the following nearly fifty years ago in his book entitled, Excellence; “In short, the varied leadership of our society must come to recognize that one of the great functions of leaders is to help a society to achieve the best that is in it.”

There is no place where that statement takes on greater significance than in the church. Significantly, it is not directed at a single leadership level or age group within the church.

Simply put: Leaders must lead.

The purpose of their leadership is also very clear. Leaders must lead an organization/church “to achieve the best that is in it.”

It does not take an above average IQ to state the obvious: As followers of Jesus Christ, Christ is in us and is head of the church. Therefore our responsibility is to be the best of who we are and do what we were created to do.

As leaders and part of the church, we are not called to be the best of who we are - - we are called to be the best of who HE is.

When those of the church begin to live as followers of Christ and take up the responsibility of leading, we will not have to tell anyone about His church. People will be drawn to His church in numbers that will stagger us.

Separation of Church and State Revisited - A Shift in Terminology

2010-08-06T03:47:00.004-06:00

I have again spent some time in our nation's capital. It seems only too appropriate to look back at thoughts from 2008.

Over the past few months, there has been a quiet shift in terminology from the leadership of our nation. Beginning with Secretary of State Clinton then to President Obama. The shift has been from using the term "Freedom of Religion" to "Freedom of Worship." I believe that puts our nation on a very slippery slide. It could easily be interpreted to mean that we are free to go inside the church of our choice to worship but do not bring anything outside the church.

By clear definition, worship and religion are two distinctly different issue. One can have freedom of worship is they truly have freedom of religion. To have only freedom of worship, does not guarantee freedom of religion.

From my Blog posted August, 2008.

Several things came out of Pastor Rick Warren's Presidential forum last week.

The first issue for me was how many Christians were ready to pass judgment before the event took place. Many were ready to condemn Pastor Warren for not asking tough enough questions before the evening started.

The biggest issues was a statement attributed to Pastor Warren..... he said that he "believes in the separation of church and state but does not believe in the separation of faith and politics. "

That is a statement we all need to hear. I believe that our politics should be shaped by our faith. For too many I feel their faith is shaped by the politics. Frankly, if our politics are shaped by our faith, we do not need to have church in our government.

It is similar to the fight for prayer in schools. The reason so many want prayer in schools is because prayer was out of our homes before it left our schools.

Our nation will be changed when we live out our faith in every area of our lives without it being mandated by government.

A Lesson from Mary Poppins

2010-08-05T06:20:00.005-06:00

Last evening, Billie and I had an extraordinary evening with Courtney and Judy in Washington DC. Beginning with a dinner that surpassed even our wildest expectations and then to the Kennedy Center for Performing Arts to watch the stage production of Mary Poppins.

A scene in Act 1 of Mary Poppins happened so quickly, it was very easy to miss it. Yet it stuck with me and I thought about it even after arriving home.

In the scene, a gentleman gave each of the two children a "six-pence." The young man proudly stated that he knew what it was worth. The response of the gentleman is the power statement. He stated and I am paraphrasing, "You may think you know the worth, but you will not know the value until you spend it."

I am not sure that I heard anything after that statement for the next few minutes.

That is a statement we need to remember in life about ourselves and others.

God has given each of us time, talents and treasures. The world tries to put a price on them. The world tries to tell us what each of them are worth. But, what is the true value?

Each day has a worth. Yet, how different we feel about the value of the day based on what we have done or more importantly, what we have given of our day to others.

The worth of $50 is $50. Yet to the person who has much, $50 does not have much value. However to the person who has little or nothing, $50 may seem like a fortune.

Giving an hour of your day to a person whose life seems to be coming apart may have greater value than a day doing something else.

I finished the night thinking about my life. It is not a question of what my life is worth. I think my life is worth Christ dying on a cross for me. But what will the value of my life be when I am all done? That will be determined by how I decide to spend every moment God gives me.

Each of us need to ask ourselves - not what is our life worth, but what will the value of our life be?

You may think you know what your life is worth, but you will not know the value until you spend it. Spend your life wisely.

It is Not Enough to Know Where You Want to Go

2010-08-04T05:43:00.004-06:00

Very often leaders believe it is enough just to know where they want to go. The fact is that "the where" must be accompanied by a clear "how to get there."

The Reverend Billy Graham tells a story of a time early in his ministry when he arrived in a small town to preach. Wanting to mail a letter, he asked a young boy where the post office was Located.

After the boy had told him, Rev. Graham thanked him and said, “If you’ll come to the Church this evening, you can hear me telling everyone about God and how to get to Heaven.”

“I don’t think I’ll be there,” the boy said. “Can you really get me to heaven, mister, if you don’t even know your way to the post office”

I am a believer that God-sized visions need to be combined with God-sized plans and men and women of God who are willing to work. I mean really work - God-sized work.

I love Isaiah 32:8. "But the noble man makes noble plans, and by noble deeds he stands."

I also want to caution leaders from getting the false idea that we are to seek God for the where and then figure out the how on our own, as if we were really that smart.

No, God is in the where and the how.

Some leaders use the term of being "aligned" with God's vision and plans. I want to be painted on them. I do not want to be alongside aligned. I want to be painted on so well that to remove me from God's vision and plans someone will have to work hard to scrape me off. I want my life to be one and the same with God's vision and plans for me to serve Him.

"For I know the plans I have for you," declares the Lord, "plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future." (Jer 29:11,NIV)

So, it seems fairly simple - - Get a vision and get to work. Or, as Pastor Mark Batterson stated as one of the NCC core values, "Pray like it depends on God and then work like it depends on you."

Our Vision - A Chosen Generation

2010-08-03T04:00:00.004-06:00

Yesterday I wrote about vision. I am sure that many wondered if the vision of ACG can be seen with the eyes of the heart and mind.

Here it is for the world to know.

ACG Vision: To see an explosion of dynamic intergenerational churches reproducing among God’s people.

I love the idea of being a part of something that is "God-size" and not "me size."

Close your eyes and picture your church as a place where all age-groups matter - a place "where everyone serves and gets to be served." Picture your church pouring into the lives of people of all ages in communities and churches in your community, city, state, country and even around the world.

Picture the families of your church worshiping, growing and serving together.

Picture all that and you will know why I think God created me and what I believe God wants me to pour into with all my energy and strength.

I am loving the journey.

Seeing the Vision

2010-08-02T07:41:00.004-06:00

Yesterday I attended one of the services of National Community Church (NCC) in Washington D.C. Having read several of Pastor Mark Batterson’s books and followed his blog, I have wanted to visit NCC for quite a while.

Sitting in the Loews Theater in Georgetown, the Service had a different feel to it. It was very comfortable and it still felt very much like “church.”

I had read on Mark’s blog that NCC was opening the 6th location in September. In addition to the various locations for weekend services, the ministry “atlas” listed over 60 small groups that meet all over the area. It was impressive and very accommodating.

In his message, Pastor Mark (re)cast the vision “20/20.” I do not believe it mattered if you were hearing it for the first time, such as in my case; or if you had been a part of the church for a long time - - When you heard it and you could immediately “See it.” I knew instantly what he meant and my mind instantly started to see the other locations. It took no explanation. Twenty locations by the year 2020.

How clear is the vision of your church or organization? Can you state it clearly? Does it stick?

Vision is a color portrait of an achievable future that is painted on the heart and mind.

A vision must be seen with the eyes of your heart as well as the eyes of your mind.

Here is an easy test - - Ask 5-10 people within your organization or church if they know the vision. But first, can you repeat the vision without referring to your notes? Can you see it?

Before people will follow you, they need to know you have a vision for where you are going.

Another Church that Really Gets it Right

2010-04-06T08:17:00.004-06:00

On Sunday, March 28, Billie and I attended Woodland Hills Family Church in Branson, MO. Woodland Hills has become the home church for our son, Chad and our daughter-in-law, Tanya. It was a great experience.

Chad had told me about the pastor, Ted Cunningham and I was really looking forward to meeting him. Pastor Ted is the founding pastor of this 8 year old church. It has exploded and he is in demand across the country as a speaker. In addition to speaking on the faculty of the Smalley Relationship Center, he is a speaker at Men at the Cross conferences.

During his Sunday message, Pastor Ted shared that it was about three years ago that the church leadership made a very distinct change that impacted every area of the ministry of Woodland Hills. They believed that God wanted them to be a family and to build God’s family. As a result, the ministry of Woodland Hills, from the pulpit to the classes, should be directed at strengthening the family.

I am fairly certain that Pastor Ted did not share this message to impress me. OK, I am absolutely positive that he did not share this to impress me. However, he nailed it. Woven into his message, which was based on Ephesians, he spoke about being the intergenerational family and the power of Rites of Passage. He shared that his desires was to raise his children to be strong Godly Adults, not get by with good teenagers. He was also very clear that his kids would become adults as part of God’s plan, at the age of 12.

As a note, Woodland Hills Family Church sounds like most other churches in any suburb in the United States. Unlike all the others, this church meets in a purple castle in the heart of Branson, across the parking lot from an amusement park. Now that rocks.

If you are in Branson on a Sunday morning, it is a great place to call home, even if it is just for a weekend.

Seeing it for the first time, Again

2010-03-24T05:02:00.004-06:00

During the past two weekends, I have been privileged to be a present as two different churches have conducted Rites of Passage celebrations for their young adults. New Life in Venice, FL and Pioneer Valley in Huntington, MA are two of the growing number of churches that are intentionally recognizing their sons and daughters as young adults, rather than teens, adolescents or merely youth.

I am always "blown away" by these weekends.

One of the aspects of the Rites of Passage weekend that leaves me reduced to a pile of human rubble is The Father's Blessing for the current adults.

The first night is a time of teaching to prepare the church with a clear understanding of Biblical principles and to be ready for the actual Rite of Passage. It is at he close of this session that the opportunity is given to the current adults to receive a Father's Blessing if they have never known that blessing. Men and women of all ages respond to the invitation for their pastor and leaders to stand in the gap as "spiritual fathers" and speak a blessing over them. Lives are absolutely changed. Every time I have had the privilege of seeing this take place, over three quarters of the church has responded.

Over and over, I have witnessed the power of the "Blessing."

Several years ago when I first wrote, Men of Honor Women of Virtue, my friend, Pat Morley advised me to make the first chapter of the book, the story of my own blessing, back in 1994. It was then that along with the publisher, we made the decision to move, what was originally Chapter 17 to what is now Chapter 1.

I absolutely love being a part of Rites of Passage. I have said on many occasions that I still cannot believe that God actually lets me do this.

It is always amazing to see the Father's Blessing for the first time, again.

Everyone Has Something to Offer

2010-01-28T04:08:00.002-07:00

Nearly 40 years ago my good friend and mentor, Dr Gary Sallquist, gave me a book. It was one of several he gave me and encouraged me to read. Gary may not remember giving me the book or that I still have it held together by a rubber band.

The book titled, Excellence, by John W. Gardner was first published in 1961; and my paperback version was printed in 1971. By the way, the price on the book is $.95.

One of my favorite stories of understanding leadership and identifying leaders comes from the tattered pages of this old book.

“There are many varieties of excellence. This is one of those absurdly obvious truths of which we must continually remind ourselves. The Duke of Wellington, in a famous incident, revealed an enviable understanding of it. The government was considering a dispatch of an expedition to Burma to take Rangoon. The Cabinet summoned Wellington and asked him who would be the ablest general to head such an undertaking. He said, “Send Lord Combermere.” The government official protested: “but we have always understood that your Grace thought Lord Combermere a fool.” The Duke’s response was vigorous and to the point. “So he is a fool, and a damned fool, but he can take Rangoon.”

All too often, many of us miss talent and gifting in people because we cannot get by their appearance or personality to see what they have to offer. This is certainly true when it comes to trying to achieve an intergenerational community, whether at church or the workplace.

It is not limited to older looking at younger. It also prevents younger from seeing the value of a more seasoned age-group. In addition, this disease can keep those in the middle from wanting to be around older or younger.

Many churches and organizations are failing to connect with incredible young men and women, as well as phenomenal older men and women who have so much to offer “The Body” because we think we have to like someone for them to be a contributor. The “talent drain” in most churches is one of the most destructive inhibitors to growth.

Gardner makes the following statement in his chapter, The Great Talent Hunt”:

“…all who care about excellence in a society must be vigilant concerning the waste of talent. Teachers, curators, deans, critics, art dealers, editors, foundation officers, publishers—in short, all who are in a position to encourage talent—should continuously ask themselves whether the society is providing sufficient opportunities for its varied resources of talent. If important kinds of talent are withering on the vine, they had better know why.”

We could easily exchange the “church” for the word “society” in Gardner’s statement.

Are our churches missing a wealth of talent in all age groups because we cannot get past personality and appearance to see that everyone has something to offer?

I believe that one of the characteristics of great intergenerational churches will be that everyone gets to serve and be served. We all bring something to the table that is valuable and needed.

Leaders need to know who can “take Rangoon” regardless of their personality or appearance.

Paraphrasing the previous words of John Gardner, “If important kinds of talent and leadership in all age groups are withering on the vine in our churches or just leaving because they do not feel they have a place to grow, leaders had better know why and be willing to change.”

Gardner, John W., Excellence, Perennial Library, Harper & Row, Publishers, 1971, p. 151, 52

A Post/Response by Chad Stecker

2010-01-21T10:43:00.003-07:00

This entry was posted by Chad Stecker after my last blog entry. Chad, Tanya and Makayla have now moved officially to Branson, MO where Chad is the Manager of Music City Centre.

Chad is also on Facebook and Twitter. One of the most important things I want my children to remember is that while I am proud of what they do, I am incredibly proud of who they are.

Chad's entry from a few days ago.

Chad Stecker just took a break from a hectic day at work to read dads blog on "Needing more than Rest". I remember reading this when he first wrote it and liking it very much so, but after the recent events of moving to Branson I was enlightened by this reading in a whole new light. My parents and mother in law went to Kansas to ...do the entire move with my wife and daughter so that I could begin working at my new job. They packed boxes and loaded them and everything we owned on a 26 ft trailer and 3 cars. They worked their tails off for about a week so that Tanya and I could make a better life for us and our family. As they all pulled into the driveway here in Branson and then proceeded to to work hard to unload and unpack. I noticed that I have never seen any of them more tired than I did right then. They didn't just need rest, but even more so, they needed restoration. My parents (including my mother in law) are in need of restoration because of what they have done for me and my family. As a parent now I see what my parents do for me and give up for me in a brand new light. I have begun to see my father God in a whole new light through the actions of my own parents. I can remember so many times in my life that my parents became weary doing whatever it took to take care of me, but this time was different. During my devotion today my Father God helped me realize that it is my job as their child, who has benefited from what they have given to me and given up for me, to be an acting part of the restoration God wants to bring them. As children we can and should take an active roll in being a part of Gods plan to give physical, mental, emotional, and spiritual restoration to our parents. Stand up and give back to those who have given so much to you already. Thank you Mom, Dad, Dory and Pops!

So... You can post a comment if you like or better yet, go to the Music City Centre in Branson, MO and tell him yourself.

Needing More Than Rest

2010-01-19T09:15:00.001-07:00

I posted this blog in 2008. Today I re-read for myself as I am very tired as a result of the pace and helping move Chad, Tanya and Makayla. Felt it might be appropriate for others.

Several years ago good friends gave Billie and I their cottage to stay in and rest. When I say cottage that is not doing justice to La Casita. Al and Marta have been friends for several years and whenever our family could get south of Tampa to Venice, FL we had a place to hide out and rest.

The trip several years ago taught me a good lesson. Remember that a lesson once learned for me does not mean that I will not have to learn that lesson again.

Billie and I arrived at La Casita absolutely exhausted. On Sunday we went to church followed by dinner with friends and then back to the hideout we went and crashed. after an afternoon nap and walk we had a light dinner and sitting in the chair reading I felt myself getting ready to doze off. I distinctly remember thinking that if I fall asleep now I will not be able to sleep tonight. not to be swayed by common sense I was out for over an hour. Yet that night I slept like a rock. when I woke up on Monday I thought now that I am rested I can have a normal day. Not so.... I napped in the mid morning, the afternoon and again after dinner and slept that night again like a rock.

Tuesday was a new day and now revived I was ready for what the world had to offer. I was a new man and rested. Yet Tuesday was repeat of Monday and by the way so was Wednesday.

When Thursday came around I was more than rested I felt restored.

In my reading and quiet time it was as if the Lord spoke and said "When you are tired, you need rest. But when you are weary, your need restoration."

That was significant for me. There is a major difference between tired and weary and thus the need for rest and restoration. Whe I am tired a good nights rest usually takes care of it. But, when I am weary, a couple of nights sleep and I still get tired and run-down by the afternoon.

Why do I share this with you now.... Billie and I have again left town. Not really for vacation but for restoration. This business of living and trying to live to the fullest takes a toll....physically, spiritually, mentally and emotionally. We both found ourselves more than tired but again weary. So we are hiding out and sleeping late, reading and probably eating too much. We are with some great friends who allow us to rest.

Then I am brought back to very familier Scripture that I need to read regularly.

The Lord is my shepherd, I shall not want.
He makes me lie down in green pastures,
He leads me besides still waters,
He restores my soul.

And that is it....He restores my soul.

This has become a major issue for me. I must realize the difference between tired and weary and thus the need for rest or restoration.

My Reading List for 2010 - At Least a Start

2010-01-11T07:19:00.005-07:00

Since my last blog several have asked about my current reading list. Here is a look at what is on the list for the start of the year. The easiest way to get a chapter to download is to “google” the title.

Holy Bible – I have the NIV (new one for Christmas) and NKJV at my reading morning place.

Devotional – Streams in the Desert by L. B. Cowman, edited by Jim Reimann. The Exec Leadership team of Seismic Publishing Group decided that we would each use this devotional in 2009. I am continuing with the same one this year.

Books

Men of Honor Women of Virtue, Chuck Stecker, 2010, Seismic Publishing Group. I am re-reading what I wrote. It is not an ego trip but I did a lot of research for this book and I am refreshing to keep myself fresh – if that makes sense. One of the changes in the book is that we have moved the study guides from the end of the book to having them follow each chapter. Should be available at the end of January @ www.achosengeneration.org

Master Leaders, George Barna, 2009, Barna Books (an imprint of Tyndale House) – This is really a great book and one that needs to be processed. A very good book for small group study as well. You may download a chapter at:

Leadership as an Identity, by Crawford W. Loritts, Jr, 2009, Moody Publishers – Crawford Loritts has long been one of my favorite speakers at men’s events. His messages are always worth the time and hit me right between the eyes. This book is no different. He identifies four traits that leaders have; 1) Brokenness 2) Uncommon Communion 3) Servanthood as an Identity and 4) Radical, Immediate Obedience. Filled with “Notes on Leadership.”

What Americans Really Want…Really, Dr. Frank I. Luntz, 2009, Hyperion Books. This book helps us understand and then develop strategies to reach this generation. “No one in America has done more observing of more people than Dr. Frank I. Luntz. From Bill O'Reilly to Bill Maher, America's leading pundits, prognosticators, and CEOs turn to Luntz to explain the present and to predict the future. With all the upheavals of recent events, the plans and priorities of the American people have undergone a seismic shift. Businesses everywhere are trying to market products and services during this turbulent time, but only one man really understands the needs and desires of the New America.”

Think Orange, Reggie Joiner, 2009, David C. Cook. An amazing book that speaks to the very issue of “InterGenerational Ministry” in youth ministry. It is a book that needs to be read by every pastor, youth leader and parent. What Joiner advocates is the power of church and family combined in a young person’s life.

Lost and Found, Ed Stetzer, 2009, B&H Publishing Group. The sub-title is “The Younger Unchurched and the Churches That Reach Them.” Stetzer and the co-authors have researched and share some very good insights, not the least of which is the power of “intergenerational” relationships. This is a very important book for church leaders.

The Intergenerational Church, Peter Menconi, 2008, Mt. Sage Publishing. Pete has done a great job in analyzing the generations within this current generation. Pete has been doing “Intergenerational” ministry for many years and his book is a foundational look at the world we live in today. You can get this book from www.achosengeneration.org.

Good Day! The Paul Harvey Story, Paul J. Batura, 2009, Regnery Publishing. Billie and I listened to the author at a local book store several months ago and after hearing the author, we both wanted to read the book.

In addition to the books listed, I have several books from Search Institute. This organization primarily targets schools, but has some great materials for teens and pre-teens. I am reviewing a few of the books including; Parenting Preteens with a Purpose, Empowering Youth, Launching Your Teen into Adulthood and Engage Every Parent. Find them at: http://www.search-institute.org/

This is a start for 2010. There are so many good books and resources. As the year progresses, I will share other books and resources that find their way to my reading table. Happy reading. Have a great year!

What Are You Going to Read in 2010?

2010-01-06T12:02:00.009-07:00

What Are You Going to Read in 2010?
Perhaps the first question should be, "Are you going to read anything in 2010?" I think your answer to that question will be foundational to your decision to grow or just "tread water" in this New Year.

Late in 2009, there was a statistic floating around that stated many men do not read another book after finishing high school. Wow!! I did not know we had to read any in High School. Frankly, I am not sure whether or not the statement is with or without any valid authentication. I do know this--It is virtually impossible to grow if you do not intentionally read.

Three questions deal with the real issue:

1. Do you want to grow in 2010?

2. If you want to grow, have you decided to read for that growth?

3. If you want to grow and have decided to read--What will you read?

I have a few suggestions and these apply first and foremost to me.

1. Daily read God's Word. It does not have to be a set amount of chapters or verses. It must be a daily decision that becomes as natural as eating. People do not decide to eat every day. That is a given! In fact, we must make a deliberate decision "not to eat." Eating is natural. Therefore, reading God's word must become the natural thing to do each day.

2. Read for Growth. Women do this so much better than us guys. Yet, as men, we are not excused from this requirement. We must be deliberate and set time aside for this area of our lives.

3. Read something for pleasure. Several years ago my younger brother, who is a staff pastor in Omaha, NE, challenged me to read for pleasure. It was a good call. In fact, he sent me a book to start the process. I read it and he sent me a second one.

Now comes the critical question.... How do you actually do this?

Here are some of the steps that have been helpful to me. First, I want you to know that I was not a "reader" growing up in my early to mid-years. I read what was necessary. I made a decision to change.

1. Place to read. This has been significant. I have a chair with books all around. It is my place and I love it. I start my mornings in my chair.

2. Time to read: When it comes to my devotional time and reading the Bible, I do best in the morning. Then I read at other times as well. Think about this: the amount of TV that we Americans watch is staggering. If you made a decision to skip one show and read, your reading skills and amount you read would make a quantum leap.

3. What to read. Do not wait until you are ready to read before you decide what to read. I created a reading list, acquired several of the books which are then readily available for reading. Some books are for pleasure, others for personal growth and still others research for ministry issues.

4. Be accountable with others. It is great to read books with others. It creates an atmosphere of accountability; and men especially do much better if they know that on a given day, a group is going to be discussing the first 4 chapters of any given book. I have read several books this way and even with my sons who live in different states.

My good friend and author, Ken Larson, is the go-to guy when it comes to LifeWalking. He is always quick to ask men, "Are you going to learn to dance or just move with the music?" That statement really speaks to the issues of life.

Are we just going to slide through life and let things happen to us or did God create us to make things happen?

I think my ability to make things happen may be directly tied to reading and growing.

Finally in the words of my friend and leadership development pastor, Mac Lake--"Leaders are readers and readers are leaders."

From my Library - - Primal by Mark Batterson

2009-12-20T08:08:00.003-07:00

From my Library
Primal
A Quest for the Lost Soul of Christianity

Several weeks ago, I received an advance copy of Primal by Mark Batterson. I was excited to receive the book as his previous book, Wild Goose Chase, was a significant read for me.

Let me begin by stating that I have followed Mark on Twitter and Facebook for quite a while; and as a result, I feel I have become acquainted with him from a distance. Primal, as did Wild Goose Chase, continued to show me more about the heart of the man that God is using significantly.

Anyone who has been around me for any length of time knows of my love affair with Italy. Living in Italy for five years certainly had an impact on me that has left me with clear prejudices for the Italians and their incredible history. I say that to help you understand why the beginning of Primal grabbed me and did not release me until the final page.

Mark begins by sharing the story of his visit to one of my favorite places in Rome, The Church of San Clemente. I have recommended this stop to anyone who was going to Rome. To get all the details of his story, you should read Primal. However, I was captured by his statement, “With each step, a layer of history was stripped away until all that was left was Christianity in all its primal glory.”

In the pages that follow the opening story, Mark weaves incredible illustrations and remarkable facts into a timeless book that should be read by everyone professing to be a Christ-follower.

Clearly divided into four sections that address the heart, soul, mind and strength of Christianity, Mark pulls no punches.

Think about a few statements:

“In my experience, it’s much easier to act like a Christian than it is to react like one.”

“Have you ever noticed the way that suffering helps us become less self-absorbed?”

“The problem with the prosperity gospel is that anytime you put an adjective in front of the gospel, you distort the gospel.”

Early in the book, Mark makes the statement, “The bottom line is this: your focus determines your reality.”

I think more than anything else, Primal was written to help us change our focus. When we focus on the heart, soul, mind and strength that God desires for us, we allow God to change our reality.

This is not a book for the “make me feel good about myself crowd.” It is a book for the group that not just says, but means “have your way with me, Lord.”

Do I recommend Primal? Absolutely yes!

It is a book to be read and studied. It is a book to be processed and then shared with others.

Learning from Leaders - - - Pastor Jim Ladd

2009-12-13T11:06:00.004-07:00

Asking the Right (Tough) Questions

Many men are blessed with great friends. Many have incredible pastors. Many have remarkable brothers. Very few men I know have all of those same men in their pastor. I am blessed to have a pastor who is my friend, brother and pastor---Pastor Jim Ladd.. Jim is my Senior Pastor at Grace Community Church.

There are many advantages in having one man as all three in my life. It would take more than one blog to explain all that means to me.

One of the great strengths that Jim possesses and frankly has worked hard to develop is his ability to ask the right and very often tough questions. Jim shared with me over a year ago that the person who asks the right questions can often guide the discussion and he has proven that theory over and over again.

Here are some of things that I have observed watching Jim ask the right questions:

1. He has worked hard to be a very good student of people. I watch him in groups as he watches body language as he listens to the words spoken. He also watches the response of others to what is being said by someone else.

2. Jim listens to what “is not said.” Many of his questions are a result of what the person did not say for a number of reasons.

3. Jim is not afraid of asking the “too tough” questions that other leaders shy away from to not risk offending the person.

4. Most importantly, Jim is acceptable to others asking him tough questions. I think he puts himself in positions and places that give people permission and opportunity to ask the tough questions.

Jim does not just ask questions of others and invite questions, he asks tough questions openly as a way of sharing what he is wrestling with in life and ministry.

I could share specifics but it is far better to refer you to some of his questions.
Jim regularly blogs and his recent postings are worth everyone's time to read and consider. I invite you to go to http://jimladd.blogspot.com/

I should also add that Jim is passionate about "InterGenerational" ministry.

Specifically, I invite you to take a look at the vital questions that Jim has posed and is wrestling with for our church. He is at Question #7. Do not short change yourself and read only the last one. Go back to the beginning and read Questions 1-6.

I think these touch on the the tough questions that need to be addressed by every church and ministry.

Jim, thanks for being my friend, brother in arms and my pastor. I look forward to seeing you next week....What is your next question?

Thoughts on Turning 75

2009-12-05T08:03:00.005-07:00

I am coming to believe that 75 is the new “65.” There was a time many years ago that I thought that 65 was well into a retirement season and at 65 everything was pretty much downhill.

Now upon reaching 62, I am seeing things just a little different. It is not just my change of thinking – but perhaps seeing better the world around me. I am seeing men and women in their 70’s, 80’s and even 90’s still really making a great difference.

It is also coming to the realization that younger generations need some seasoned men and women who are willing to “stay in the race” with them.

So Lord willing, where do I want to be at 75?

Spiritually, I want to be a much stronger Man of God - - Son of the King.

As a husband, I want to God to be pleased and others amazed at the love I have for my wife when I just look at her from across the room.

As a father, I want my kids to have a stronger dad to count on to support them and walk with them as they grow and raise their families.

As a “papa”, I want to Rock & Roll and be a source of fun, wisdom and safety for my grandkids.

As a brother, I want to work to keep my family close and growing in love for one-another and to intentionally see each of them and their families more.

As a friend, I want my friends to know that they can count on me.

As a mentor/coach/encourager, I want to be actively reproducing into leaders of every age. I want to see people getting stronger and better as the person God created each of them to become.

As a ministry leader, I want to see an explosion of InterGenerational Churches that are reproducing around the world and I want to take part in striking a match and lighting the fuse.

There are several words that come to mind that are critical if I am to start becoming the man I want to be at 75: discipline, intentionality and love.

I must become more disciplined in the things that God has convicted me of in my heart. Discipline is hard work but it feels so much better that regret.

Intentionality is vital in every area of my life. Great things do not just happen.

And the greatest of these is love. Without love does any of this really matter? I want a desperate love for God; a passionate love for my family; a committed love for my friends; and joyful, exuberant and energetic love for the life and ministry that God created me for and has given me.

I will not and I refuse to creep up to 75 like it is a haunted house. I have a lot of work to do and I intend to blow past 75 like an Indy race car because I am looking at some great men of God in their 80’s and 90’s who are making me look like I am standing still.

Well - - - Game on!!!

Catch you all later---I have a lot to do today!

Learning from Leaders - - - Mac Lake

2009-12-01T16:22:00.005-07:00

Real Leaders Invest in Themselves

It was one of those rare moments when you meet someone who immediately strikes you as a person who you would like to spend a lot of time. That has happened to me several times and I do not remember many times that my instincts have been wrong.

It was one of those occasions several years ago at a conference in San Diego, CA. My pastor had assigned me to attend a workshop that was facilitated by a leadership pastor from Charleston, SC. I sat for nearly an hour listening to Mac Lake share about developing leaders and realized very quickly that Mac was able to discuss and teach on the subject because he was actually doing what he was teaching.

We have all seen cases of people teaching the theoretical but who have never really made it happen.

This was clearly not the case with Mac Lake. It was so clear...This guys does it first and talks about it second.

In the years that have followed, my travels allowed me to get by Charleston to spend a weekend with Mac and have a meal with him. That was a great experience. The best part has been reading his blog http://www.maclakeonline.com/.

If someone were to ask me what the #1 leadership resource was on the market today, I would (and have) referred them to Mac's blog.

In addition to sharing very significant ideas for developing leaders, Mac is one of the best I have met at "sharing the spotlight" with others. Regularly he is using his space to guide you to another leader who deserves to be heard.

One of his best blog entries for me probably would not rank as high for others, but it really struck me hard. On November 25th, Mac wrote about investing in your own leadership development.

We can never stop learning and growing if we are going to be used by God to develop other leaders.

I am sure that most people receive Mac's blog and think that they have something else to develop new leaders. Every time I receive a new post, all I can think about is that I must keep growing if I am to help anyone else.

Mac has been mentoring me for several years now. We have not seen each other for a since I last visited him and we have emailed a couple of times--but his impact on me is significant and he probably doesn't even know it.

Hey Mac...Thanks for continuing to invest in me.

Learning from Leaders - Dan Schaffer

2009-10-30T09:55:00.004-06:00

Teaching, Leading and Reproducing

It was the second week of September, 1994. I had been on the staff of Promise Keepers for all of two weeks. I sat with Doc Reed listening to one of the founders of Promise Keepers. He was one of those unassuming guys that when you first met you did not quite know how to take him. Although it was over 15 years ago, I could take you back to the Chinese restaurant and to the exact spot we were seated.

Dan was the Director of Training for PK; and as I sat and listened to him, I realized that very little of what he was saying was about PK. He was sharing a clear strategy for building men. It became very clear then and has only been reinforced in the years following that God birthed in Dan a “to die for” passion to see men transformed as spiritually reproducing fathers.

I could hardly keep up with what he was sharing--not because he was speaking in a foreign language or the subject was so complicated. I had never really heard a man speak so clearly about real manhood. The best part was that it was not men against anything but, it was men for God.

Then he hit us with the statement--the one statement that grabs you so hard that you have to just stop and have it repeated. It is not a statement that requires a follow-on sentence to help you understand. No, this statement was clear and required no further explanation.

Dan simply said to Doc and I, “You can’t teach what you don’t know. You can’t lead where you won’t go. You only reproduce what you are.”

In one sentence Dan changed the landscape of men’s ministry for me. I was all excited about what I could do as a Regional Director for the largest growing men’s movement in the world. Dan made it personal. Men’s ministry was more about who I am and not what I intend to do. When I focus on what I will do, it is about me. When I focus on who I am, it becomes all about God.

Hardly a month goes by where I do not quote Dan. Over the years, Dan has become one of my best friends. We have learned to go “toe to toe” and grow stronger. He and his wife, Jan, are important parts of mine and Billie’s lives.

Dan has not changed since we first met. His ongoing passion is to grow strong, maturing, and reproducing spiritual fathers. After his days at PK where God used him mightily, Dan was led to launch a new ministry, Building Brothers (www.buildingbrothers.org). Dan is still doing what God created him to do.

The “takeaway” from my years with Dan is simple--we are all going to reproduce something in everyone we meet. I must put my energies into becoming the man God created me to be, and God will allow me to reproduce that part of Him into others.

Learning from Leaders - - - Pastor Andy Addis

2009-10-21T12:01:00.005-06:00

Sustainable Pace

Last month I was with our son at the health club he manages in Hutchinson, KS. Chad arranged for one of his top personal trainers to spend some time with me and walk me through some training that I could do at home or on the road.
You can check out Genesis at http://www.genesishealthclubs.com/

Joe asked me what outcomes I wanted from my training. I thought for a moment and responded that I need “strength, agility, speed and endurance.” Other than that I felt I was doing pretty well. Over the course of the next hour, Joe helped me understand some key principles; and he helped me with some specific exercises that I can use anywhere.

The following day, I met with one of my heroes, Pastor Andy Addis. If you follow my blog, Facebook© or Twitter©, Andy’s name is not new to you. I have known him for several years and look forward to every occasion we can get some time together. As a Senior Pastor, he is one of the leading thinkers and practitioners of InterGenerational ministry, as well as multi-site churches. Every time Andy and I sit down for any amount of time, I usually leave with pages of notes.

As a “side-bar,” Andy is over 20 years younger than I am; and he is one who teaches me. I say that for the older guys who are not taking the time to really listen and learn from younger men and women.

Now to the bottom line-- As Andy and I talked, I asked him what he had been learning in the time since we had last seen each other. He stated three things. One, however, was the game-winning homerun.

He told me that he must maintain a “sustainable pace.” The moment Andy let the words go; I went back to my training session with Joe. I need “strength, agility, speed and endurance” and a sustainable pace.

That does not mean that there are not periods of increased or high intensity. It means that as I seek to run the race God has set for me, there are days I need to run and on others I need to walk. There are days that are sprints and others that are a steady pace. Yet, over time, the entire pace must be sustainable.

Life, especially our spiritual life, requires “strength, agility, speed and endurance” and a “sustainable pace.” You would think that a guy my age would have this pretty well mastered. Not so -- but I am working on it.

Thank you Andy -- See you soon!

Check out Andy Addis and his messages at his blog http://www.crosseyedlife.com/
and website -- http://www.andyaddis.com/

Learning from Leaders - - - Steve Spicer

2009-10-07T14:29:00.004-06:00

Increased Capacity and Stronger Boundaries

Several weeks ago I met with one of my close friends. Steve Spicer and I have been meeting for several years on a regular basis. He is one the many men who I feel that I always get more than I am able to give. Steve is one of my heroes. He is balancing a full-time position in the work place and leading a vibrant and life changing ministry. You can check out his ministry Marked Men for Christ at http://www.markedmenforchrist.org/

Our conversations are always intense. We have a tendency to put everything on the table and then wrestle for God’s best for each of us.

This was the core issue last time we met. Steve said that he wanted God to give him increased capacity. I also would ask for that. As we discussed the issue we also acknowledged that we were doing about what we could in the natural. To increase our pace and effectiveness without giving up other very important issues such as family and church, we needed God to move in the super-natural.

As we discussed the issue I realized that for me (and probably for Steve) we needed God to give us stronger boundaries for the increased capacity.

I thought of it in this manner. Certain containers are made of paper and they have the capacity to hold a certain weight without breaking. If that container were to be made of a stronger material such as cardboard it could hold much heavier amounts. It seemed to me that we have a capacity and we are asking God to let us hold more.

In that same line of thought, if our container were made of steel, we could really hold some weight without breaking or coming apart.

Steve and I agreed that we would pray for each other for increased capacity and for God to strengthen the container or give us stronger boundaries. There are times when it seems that we are asking God for more in volume but the issue is that God is waiting to give us more in density or weight.

Simply put….there are still just 24 hours in a day. Even though I often say and try to live like there are 36. I am not asking God to give me more hours. I want to be more effective with the hours I have been given.

So for me and Steve……Increased capacity must be accompanied by stronger boundaries.

Quit Trying to Pass On Your Faith

2009-09-11T06:27:00.002-06:00

For as long as I can remember this phrase has been shared by many to parents and church members. I have come to believe that although well intended, we are missing the point and failing miserably.

At conferences and seminars across the country, I have shared this illustration. Imagine if I would have taken my two sons to my closet when they were young men and ready to take on the world and with great pride presented to them my old wardrobe. There before them would be my clothes from the 50’s, 60’s, 70’s, 80’s, and 90’s and also from 2000 on. But it gets better. Not onely do I show them this vast array of incredible clothing, I tell them that it is all for them now. Wear everything proudly.

There would be a moment of silence. They would look at each other as if to say, “You tell him.” Them one of the would begin by saying, “Dad, we love you.” They would get that out first. But then they would say, “Dad, these things don’t fit us. They are not our size or style. They are not comfortable and really, dad, we would never wear any of these things.” I think they would finish by saying, “Dad, we love you. Really your heart is right. Your head may be a little messed up but your heart is right.”

This story seems funny to most of us. We cannot imagine doing this to our kids or to ourselves. The only place this really happens is in our churches. We have this archaic notion that we must pass on our faith as if it is an old garment that they would love to have for their own.

We must change our mindset and our approach to faith with our children. Our responsibility is not to pass on our faith. Our responsibility is to create a safe place for our children to develop their own faith. Like wardrobes, faith may look different generation after generation. Yes, just as with clothing we must teach some basics. One of the things in life today that breaks my heart is Christian men who let their daughters dress like “hookers” and think it is cute or there is nothing they can do about the situation. That is a major problem and another story.

Our homes and churches must be safe places for our children and others to develop their own faith. One of the reasons that many young of our sons and daughters walk away from church when they are way from home is because they are never given the opportunity to grow their own faith. They operate on their parent’s faith and when they leave home they cast it aside with many other things.

Finally, the greatest problem with this idea of passing on my faith is that I do not have enough faith and I am not done with what faith I have. Not only do I need what I have, I need to grow it stronger.

If we want to help our children, new believers or anyone grow stronger, we must quit thinking that we have the best and only answer and naively believe that without our faith they cannot live.

Maybe the answer is not passing on our faith to them but helping them see Jesus for themselves. Maybe, just maybe we need to live a life that lets them see Jesus in us.

One of the greatest gift one generation can give another is to create a safe place for each generation to know Christ personally grow their own faith that fits them where they live, work and play.

When Warriors are Called

2009-08-26T04:49:00.000-06:00

He sent messengers throughout Manasseh, and they also were called together to follow him; and he sent messengers to Asher, Zebulon, and Naphtali, and they came up to meet them. Judges 6:35 (NAS)

This past Sunday morning my good friend Ray Morgan went to the Emergency Room of his local hospital. He had been pretty sick for several days and could not seem to get rid of a fever. After several hours in the ER, he was admitted and as of this morning was still hospitalized.

This is not a commentary on his medical condition or the medical treatment he has (or has not) received. It is really about the importance of friends and warriors who are willing to battle for and with us in this life.

After I talked to Ray on Sunday, I began to notify friends and warriors using the various means I have available. These means included Facebook, Twitter and then just sending out text messages, as well as utilizing our ministry prayer network.

In a very short time, the battle was being fought by warriors across the country and around the world. Literally within minutes, responses came back to me from men and women everywhere to let Ray know that they were praying.

Then I began to see a picture. I am a big fan of Gideon. There are a lot of reasons. When Gideon caught the vision of what God had called him to do, he sent out a call for warriors. We know that the Bible records that 32,000 responded to the call. The bible states that, “He sent messengers throughout Manasseh, and they also were called together to follow him; and he sent messengers to Asher, Zebulon, and Naphtali, and they came up to meet them.”

He Sent messengers. He clearly did not have the tools available that we have today to stay connected. Yet, 32,000 responded to his messengers.

By Monday, I had this picture in my heart of the 32,000 warriors gathered spiritually to fight for and with Ray. Some came because I asked them to be there. Many more came because they know Ray and he has impacted their lives. Others came because friends asked them to come. All in all, warriors around the world have responded.

We all need warriors around us. We must do the things necessary in our lives to develop relationships that can be counted on to respond when the messengers are sent out.

I just spoke with Ray and he seems to be getting much better. He is still hospitalized and not sure when he will be released. He also knows that he has warriors fighting as his side for him and with him.

As for me, I am so blessed to know that there are far more warriors out there than the enemy wants to acknowledge. Frankly, this is so cool!

Praying Believing but Believing for What?

2009-08-17T05:33:00.004-06:00

I am still evaluating my prayer life based on this morning Devotion from Streams in the Desert. The story related is about a captain of a steamship who was approached by George Mueller while the ship was in a dense fog off the coast of Newfoundland. Mr. Mueller told the captain that he needed to be in Quebec on Saturday. The captain was certain that would not happen. He went so far as to point out to Mr. Mueller just how dense the fog was as that point.

I love Mr. Mueller's statement. "My eye is not on the dense fog but on the living God who controls every circumstance of life."

Then what happens next is one big lesson for me. Mr. Mueller invites the captain to pray about this matter. In the words of the captain, Mr. Mueller prayed, "one of the most simple prayers I've ever heard."

But next point grabbed me. When the captain started to pray, Mr. Mueller told him not to pray. Mr. Mueller told the captain as he restrained him from praying, "First, you do not believe God will answer, and second, I BELIEVE HE HAS. Consequently, there is no need whatsoever for you to pray about it."

When they were done, Mr. Mueller told the captain to open the door and see that the fog was gone and they in fact made Quebec by Saturday.

Here are a couple of "takeaways" for me:

1. When I pray and ask God,do I believe that God may answer, could answer or already has answered?

2. Why ask people to pray who do not believe that God will answer?

3. God hears the most simple prayers. I do not need to try to impress God with my ability to pray.

This causes me to reread James 1:6 .... "But when he asks he must believe and not doubt, because he who doubts is like a wave of the sea, blown and tossed by the wind."

Praying for "Unsaved" Husbands and their wives

2009-08-13T15:25:00.000-06:00

I am sure this has not happened to anyone else. It was a morning when I wondered why something so simple was taking so long. I was just buying a book and then heading to something really important. And then it happened!

I had finished my transaction and, frankly, was not totally satisfied with the transaction that had just taken place. I slid to the side of the counter allowing the next person to conduct their business.

As she stepped forward, it was clear that this was a lady who had not had an easy life. She did not appear to be homeless, destitute or looking for a “handout.” She just looked as if life had been tougher for her than many others.

She began speaking to the female cashier by saying, “I am not sure you will remember me, but you helped me a few months ago. You suggested that I buy The Love Dare and I did.” She went on to tell the lady that she was almost finished with the entire book, but she had come to the part where you are to pray with your spouse. Then she told the cashier, “I asked my husband to pray, and he got very angry and mad at me.” She told her that her husband was not a believer and did not want her to talk with him about praying.

Then she told her why she had come into the store. She said that she had no one else to ask and so she asked the cashier if she would pray for her and her marriage. I listened as the cashier asked the lady her name and her husband’s name and then she promised to remember them both in prayer.

I could not stand back at this point. This was not a prayer that should wait or one that the lady should have to wonder if they were really lifted up in prayer. I stepped back to the counter and asked the cashier and the lady to join hands with me and I prayed.

It was not just a prayer for her or her marriage, but I sensed that she had probably never had a blessing prayed over her. So pray I did. Yes, I prayed for her, her husband and her marriage. I also prayed a blessing over her as a daughter of the “King.”

Before you get crazy and think how lucky she was that I was there…..I was the one who God allowed and gave the privilege of being a part of His work.

In our weekly prayer list, we are asking our team and anyone who reads this to pray for the ladies married to non-believers. Pray for the ladies, their husbands and their marriages. In doing so, I believe that God is allowing us to be a part of His great work.

Becoming Believable

2009-08-10T07:21:00.002-06:00

I have received a great deal of encouragement from so many friends and family. As of yesterday, Sunday, August 9, 2009 my weight was 233 lbs. I started at 258.5 lbs on June 1. The bottom line is that I have another 24 lbs to go and I am shooting for December 31 as the date.

Let me give you some observations.

1. Initial successes are easier but long term habits are much harder but far more important in life. A friend told me that he had lost 210 lbs. I stared for a moment and he clarified... "Yea, I have lost 30 lbs 7 times."

2. It is said that you will find time for the things that matter to you. I had talked a great game and even made some great charts about losing weight. I did not translate any of that planning to a place on my schedule. What really matters will find a place on your schedule.

3. Support is amazing. My biggest supporter is Billie. She encourages but she also makes sure that healthy food options are available. The guys around me are very important. Quick notes and calls to see how I am doing and actually ask "What is your weight, now?" Not a bad question for a guy who "went public."

The next 24 lbs will be the toughest for a couple of reasons. First is that I have dropped the easy to lose pounds. Secondly, I must now coordinate my eating and exercise with the increased demands of a Fall travel schedule.

So here is the deal... You may ask me about my weight anytime. Drop me a note or yell at me when I am on the platform getting ready to speak. BUT WOULD YOU ALSO ASK ME ABOUT MY DAILY DEVOTIONS, PRAYER LIFE AND DAILY WALK?

I want every area of my life to represent Christ well. It is all on the the table.

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Manly Men with Manly Toys Building Godly Men from Little Boys

2009-08-04T14:50:00.005-06:00

Manly Men with Manly Toys
Building Godly Men from Little Boys

Every year the men of EV Free Church of Eaton (Colorado) set up camp about 70 miles “west of nowhere.” They have tents of every size and shape as well as campers and trailers. In addition, men bring ATV’s, dirt bikes, rifles, shotguns, pistols, revolvers and hunting bows. Most importantly, they bring their Bibles and their sons and grandsons.

This past weekend was incredible. There were over 100 men and boys, from Grandfathers to grandsons. Ages ranged from 3 years of age to nearly 80.

Each day, starting after breakfast, men were engaged in the lives of their sons. Whether it was helping them ride a dirt bike or helping them hold a shotgun for the first time, dads were with their sons.

Each evening and on Sunday morning, men sat with their sons, son-in-laws, grandsons and brothers. There was worship, teaching and prayer. Two men stood to respond to an invitation for salvation, while holding their young sons in their arms. Sons watched their dads and grandpa’s kneel in prayer.

Here are some of the other really great things about the weekend.
1. Every dad was a dad to every boy. Think about that for just a moment. Every man there treated every son as his own. That means that every man watched out for every boy there. It means that every man did not hesitate to jump in and help every boy without worrying about whether or not it was “OK.”
2. Every dad could get help and still be a man. The security of the environment for each man to learn in front of his son, if he needed help, and then teach his own son was powerful. Sometimes the most powerful teaching moment for the son came in watching his dad ask for help, learn something new, and then turn and teach him.
3. Men were not afraid or embarrassed to “worship.” NO, I mean really worship—in song and prayer.
4. In addition to the fun, every father and son cut/split wood for the camp; and they participated in preparing, serving or cleaning up after a meal. Everyone was a “stakeholder” in the camp.

A huge “Thank You” to Pastor Craig, Pastor Jeff and the men’s leadership team for allowing me to be a part of this event. This was a weekend I will not forget.

As a note…. Every year the men do the same type of weekend with their daughters and granddaughters. Yes, they bring out the ATVs, rifles, shotguns, pistols, revolvers, hunting bows, dirt bikes. And, yes, the men enjoy worship, teaching and prayer with their daughters and granddaughters.

Our Children - God’s Legacy

2009-07-03T04:59:00.001-06:00

So the next generation would know them, even the children yet to be born, and they in turn would tell their children.

Psalm 78:6 (NIV)

We learn very soon in life that we quickly lose control of our children. We cannot control where they live or work. We cannot control where they take our grandchildren. I thought I would be smart. I told my children that I did not care where they lived, but all my grandchildren would live in Denver. That did not work!

Too often we think of leaving our legacy in terms of material wealth. Like so many other areas in our lives, we are probably looking at life differently than God.

In many ways we view our children in the same way we view our relationship with God. We have a tendency to look at what we do instead of who we are. As a result, we look at our success or failure with our children by looking at what they do instead of who they are.

When we read Psalms 78:5-7, God gives us a clear understanding of two things that are critical for establishing His legacy.

He tells us to start teaching our children so that they will teach their children. One of my favorite lines in scripture is in verse 6, “even for children yet to be born.” How many of us are really focusing on what will be taught to those who are not yet born?

A few days ago I read a quote that basically said that we are to hug our children… not just to hug them…but to teach them to hug their children.

The second issue that is critical is what to teach. Too often we focus on their actions or attitudes which make us look good as a parent. Verse 7 gives it to us with simple clarity that is great for us guys. We are to teach our children to teach their children to trust, remember and obey the Living God.

As dads, this is going to require a shift in our thinking and should result in a shift in our actions. We must begin to shape who our children are and encourage their personal relationship with Christ. The focus must not be on simply what they do.

Out of who they are will flow what they do. We have a tendency to try and shape who they are by focusing on changing the things they do. That is why so many of our children act so differently when they leave home. They adjusted their behavior to meet requirements while living in our homes. This is because we told them how to act to get along with us and did not necessarily help them become the person who would bring honor to God.

What will God’s legacy look like as a result of Him trusting you to be the earthly father for His children?

Who Do You Say He Is?

2009-07-02T05:12:00.000-06:00

Who Do You Say He Is?
Mathew 16:15

“But what about you?” he asked. “Who do you say I am?”
Mathew 16:15 (NIV)

The question that was posed to Peter by our Lord seemed pretty simple and forthright. It was as if Jesus had heard enough from the intellectual level. I can almost imagine the environment when Jesus listened to all the others. Each of their responses could have been prefaced with “Well the evidence seems to indicate……” then follow that with their conclusions based on what others were saying. “Some say John the Baptist; others Elijah; and still others, Jeremiah or one of the prophets.”

Then Jesus just cut through all the issues with the simple question to Peter. Our Lord’s question could have also have been preceded with ….. “Peter, regardless of the evidence and what others are saying, in your heart…..” Who do you say I am?”

That was the moment of truth. Yet, that same question must be answered by each one of us daily. Our answer will be stated by two separate responses. The first answer will be the words we choose to speak and the second will be shouted louder by how we choose to live our lives. It is one thing to say that Jesus is the Son of the Living God and our Lord and Savior. It is quite another thing to live our lives in such a way that shouts in an undeniable manner that Jesus is the Son of the Living God and our Lord and Savior.

I am convinced that our families, friends and those around us are going to know what we believe about Jesus before we get the chance to tell them what we think about him. They will see in us what we believe long before they hear from us what we think.

Now, here is the problem. For far too many years people around me could not hear what I was saying with my mouth about Jesus because my life was shouting too loudly a message to the contrary.

I believe that I did more to lead people from the Lord rather than to Him.

Now I have this picture that keeps running over and over again. I picture myself standing with Jesus and He is listening to all the answers from the others. Then He turns to me and says, “But what about you?” He asks, “Who do you say I am?”

Before I can answer Him, He says, “Don’t answer that. Let me just watch you today and I will see the real answer.”

So today, when others look at you and see how you choose to live your life……. Who do you say he is?

Do You Remember?

2009-07-01T06:33:00.001-06:00

This is another devotional that I wrote for "On the Road"

Do You Remember?

Psalm 78:9-11

They forgot what he had done, the wonders he had shown them.

Psalm 78:11 (NIV)

If you want to look at one of the most incredible reoccurring themes in the Bible, it is the issue of men of God forgetting all that God had done for them. It is very often followed by the phrase, “and again they did evil in the sight of the Lord.”

As men, we have this incredible propensity of “living for the moment.” Yesterday is long gone and tomorrow is out there somewhere. What really counts is today. The problem with that mentality is that we miss so much of the strength that God has intended for us.

We should draw strength from remembering (and remembering often) all that God has done for us. As if salvation was not enough, there is always so much more, for which to be grateful.

God uses the majority of Psalm 78 to remind the Israelites of all that He had done. It also emphasizes that after all of the incredible wonders that He had shown them, they continued to turn their backs on Him.

Today, most of us Christian guys live in a “what have you done for me lately” world often forgetting that God has a long history of loving us more than we can begin to love Him back.

Not only is it important for us to remember all that God has done for us, but it is critical that we pass that history of God’s love on to our children and our children’s children.

When we begin to recall God’s faithfulness, it is important that we do not just focus on the really big blessings, but remember even the smallest of blessings. Equally important is that we remember that God has done all these things out of his incredible love for us.

Our grandchildren love to have us tell them the stories of God’s love and faithfulness in our lives because it also speaks of His love for them since we are family. When God blesses our family, He blesses all of us. They draw strength from a history of blessings.

We tell the stories to remind them of the past so that they can draw strength and know that they can trust God in the future in their own lives.

As you consider your life, have you given thought to what God has done for you; and have you shared that with your family?

If you do not remember, how can they remember?

You Cannot Manage Sin

2009-06-29T16:32:00.004-06:00

Several months ago a very good friend of mine, Rick Schatz called and asked me if I would be interested in writing some devotionals for a book to be published for men. I was very honored and thrilled to be a part of a project with some men I have admired for many years. Over the next few days I will share some the devotionals that I wrote. You must also remember that when I speak and write, it is generally something that God is directing at me. The book has recently been released and I think that it is really good. It is titled "On the Road" devotionals for men who travel.

You Cannot Manage Sin

John 5:14

Later Jesus found him at the temple and said to him, “See, you are well again. Stop sinning or something worse may happen to you.”

John 5:14 (NIV)

The phone call is as clear today as it was a few years ago. It was a regular phone check-up with a very close friend to see how he was doing. He had been battling alcoholism for years and had been in and out of different rehab programs.

I asked him how he was doing with the alcohol issue and he responded with the almost normal reply, “Not bad” he said “I seem to be doing better.” Then it hit me…..He was ok with his drinking. He just wanted to get it to an acceptable level. He wanted to get his life right but still be able to drink.

It was one of those incredible wake-up calls for me. My friend was like me and most men. We think that we can beat the problem by working our way out of it. You know -- gradually getting to where we want to be in life.

We think that we can establish acceptable levels of sin that will in some way be pleasing to God.

In doing so it allows us to continue to sin but to a lesser degree so we can report that we are doing better.

So often we like to compare ourselves and our lives with really bad sins so our lives, by comparison, do not look that bad. It is like we are saying, “Come on-- give me a break. I did not kill anyone today.”

We want to ignore the sin as we let our eyes wander and even dwell on ladies inappropriately. We say to ourselves, a little look won’t hurt; after all I am getting better.

We spew out a few curse words but justify it by the heat of the moment; but again, we are getting better. Isn’t that what God wants? Jesus did not tell the man “Go and sin less each day and eventually you will become healed and free from this thing.” He said, “Go and sin no more.”

Sin is sin. God does not give us acceptable levels that are more pleasing to Him that others. There are not degrees of sin which are established by comparison with others to make us feel that we are doing better.

One of the most important steps is to look at our lives and really ask the question, “Where have I established acceptable levels of sin in my life?”

Perhaps it is time to really listen to Jesus when he said, “Stop sinning.” Pray and ask God to show you where you have established “acceptable levels” of sin and ask Him to give you the strength to stop sinning. Start with one area of your life and refuse to believe satan that some sin will be ok today. As a result our progress will then be pleasing to God.

Staying Connected

2009-06-18T10:02:00.000-06:00

Yesterday, I made the decision to call a friend just to thank them for investing in me and being a part of my life. The decision to make a call resulted in several. Some were planned and others just happened.
I try to speak at least every other day with each of our two sons who live in other states. In addition, I get to see or speak with our daughter who lives here in Littleton nearly every day. I also connect with Ray Morgan, one of our board members nearly every day for accountability and to do life together.

Here were the three calls that I decided to make yesterday. One was a no-brainer. My youngest sister had a birthday on Monday and I called to wish her a blessed and Happy Birthday. This was important since she and I have shared seasons of stupidity where we let things get in the way of our genuine love for one another. I am trying to strengthen a foundation so that does not happen again.

Secondly, I spoke with a man from California who I met at a couple of men’s events. I did not even have his number and he sent it to me on FaceBook so that I could call. Terry and I have exchanged notes of encouragement over the past year, but there are times when it is important to hear each other’s voice.

In the midst of the day, I received a call from a great friend and brother. He and I had exchanged some emails and knew that we both needed to connect just to “catch-up.” The call with David was overdue for both of us.

Finally, I called a longtime friend just to talk. I had no agenda that prompted the call. My need was to talk with Frank.

Frank Burrows has been “mentoring” me for twenty years. We first met in 1989 when our family moved to Fairfax, VA. Frank and Doris began “investing” in our entire family--not just Frank in my life and Doris in my wife’s but both of them into our sons’ lives as well.

Several years ago when God really began to stir in me regarding men’s ministry, Frank was one of my strongest encouragers. In 1992, we were re-assigned to Rome, Italy. Frank continued to encourage me regarding ministry to men. It was his specific loving prod that helped me take steps to start a small ministry to men and our sons while still in the military. That experience would lead to my seeking out a position with Promise Keepers in 1994 when I retired.

The years with Frank and Doris have had an incredible impact on me. He has a gentle wisdom that can quietly seep through the cracks to reach inside me.

Frank is 82 years old and still more active than men half his age. Yesterday when we spoke, he had already completed his daily routine of exercise followed by leading an exercise class for some “old people”—since he is young. He was very busy because he is also president of the homeowners association.

It had been too long since we last spoke. I am glad I called.

But I wonder..how many are privileged to have a “Frank Burrows” in their lives. It is not too late to find someone.

As a note, in the midst of a few calls, I did get some other work done. It is not an either/or but both.

Trying to be Believable

2009-06-15T12:44:00.004-06:00

Have you ever listened to a person but there was something about them that did not bear witness to their words? I have on several occasions. Sometimes I could figure it out, and at other times I just had this feeling. When you are super spiritual, you can call that feeling "discernment" and really sound important. So being really spiritual, I have on several occasions discerned a discrepancy between a person's words and their life.

The problem is when the person in question is me. That is where I fall into the pattern that I have spoken about to many men. I first justify the situation; and if that does not work, I make an excuse. Finally, my last resort is to try to shift the blame. It is a clear Biblical pattern that can be seen in many men. It is so much easier to speak about many men than to focus on one man--me!

Let me "cut to the chase" so to speak. Regularly I speak to me about getting started and doing something. I also speak about the need for "spiritual disciplines" in our lives. About two weeks ago I had this feeling of discrepancy between my words and my life.

How can any man believe me when I talk about the need for spiritual disciplines when I cannot even discipline myself to get into a good physical condition and lose weight. I am not talking about Olympic conditioning. I am talking about some basic health principles in my life--the disciplines needed to eat healthy (both quantity and type of food) and the discipline to exercise to maintain health and an energy level to fight the battles of this life as God intended.

So here is the deal... sort of up close and personal for everyone to know. On Monday, June 1, 2009 I weighed myself and saw a number I had not seen before for me...258.5 lbs. Since I have not received a call from the Broncos to play this year, it is time to make my life match my words.

In the first week, I focused on eating properly; and the second week I started exercising with the help of my son, Chad. After two weeks I am down 11.5 lbs. My goal is to reduce my weight to 215 lbs by the end of 2009. In addition, I want to run 5 miles in less than 40 minutes. There are other things that I could focus on, but this is a start.

The bottom line is that anyone and everyone are free to ask me about my weight, eating and exercise.

I want my words to represent God better than what I believe I am now doing. I want to be believable so that anyone who hears me or is around me will know that my God is believable.

2009-06-14T08:32:00.001-06:00

This is just a test to determine if I can blog from my phone.

Let us go to the other side

2009-06-03T05:32:00.004-06:00

In Mark 4:35, Jesus said to the Disciples, "Let us go over to the other side." So with absolute confidence the Disciples felt very comfortable to go with Jesus. Really...what could happen? They were following Jesus.

The seven verses from Mark 4:35 to 41 tell us so much.

1. Even following Jesus we may encounter some of the worst storms imaginable. In the boat were fishermen and some tough guys. Many of them had been in bad storms before. Yet, this one was so bad they feared for their lives... even with Jesus on board. Following Jesus does not exempt any of us from fierce storms in life.

2. Others started out with them. Mark 4:36b "There were other boats with him." When the water is calm and it is a nice day others will certainly join in. There is no mention of any other boats at the time of the storm. Do you think the others would only go so far and turn back? Maybe they saw the indications of a storm and turned back. Others may start with us but many will turn back and we must learn to rely on Jesus not others.

3. Doubt came upon the Disciples with Jesus in there presence. Some may tell us that if we have doubt, we are too far from Jesus. I do not believe it for a moment. the Disciples had incredible doubt and Jesus was so close they could touch Him. Doubt may come when we are walking close to Jesus and storms come. To doubt our faith is not a sign that we are not close to Jesus. God is using that moment to strengthen our faith. While it is not a sin to doubt...Don't live there, just visit.

4. They thought they knew Jesus and He showed them more of Him. Verse 41.. "They were terrified and asked each other, "Who is this? Even the wind and the waves obey him!" Just when we think we know Jesus he will surprise us and show us more of Him than we expected. Day by day and moment by moment, Jesus continues to show me more of Him than I could ever imagine.

So for me, each day is like getting in the boat again with Jesus with the promise of going to the other side. Some days (and nights) are marked by storms and others are calm. Often I cannot anticipate. I am learning to trust.

Have a great day going to the other side with Jesus today!!

Show Me Your Friends

2009-06-02T13:56:00.004-06:00

There is an old saying that goes, “Show me your friends and I will show you your future.” This statement could not have been made any clearer for me than it was this past weekend.

My wife, Billie, and I traveled to New England for the wedding of my youngest sister, Sandee. We were joined there by my sister Kitty, and her husband, John, from North Carolina and our cousin Pam and her husband, Bill, from Ohio. As we participated in the weekend activities, we observed several things that the many pictures cannot accurately portray. In many ways the old adage, “You just had to be there” was very true.

Something very significant happened while pictures were being taken. Ken our new brother (in-law), asked for all the guys from Lebanon class of “74.” Seven guys came running and joined Ken for the picture. Then it hit me…..all of these guys had been friends for nearly forty years. Not only that, but their families, including their wives and children were friends as well.

In the toast I offered, I made a comment about the groom’s friends and how comfortable it was for me and my family to see the bonds of friendship that had been forged over time.

During the course of the evening, nearly every one of the guys from the “Lebanon Class of 74” made it a point to quietly tell me that Sandee was in good hands; and they personally gave me their word that she would be safe in their community.

I know far more about my new brother (in-law) now than I could have ever learned by talking to him alone. I know this.... Ken has surrounded himself with good men.

How many friends can we count that have been our friends for over 40 years?? How about 30?? How about 20??

The real question is “What type of person does one need to be to develop friendships that will last over 40 years?”

I want to be that type of person and friend.

May We Never Forget

2009-05-24T07:24:00.006-06:00

I received this from a friend, Ted Vail of Denver. It did not need to be improved. Thanks Ted for the great reminder of the origin and purpose of Memorial Day.

Memorial Day was originally known as Decoration Day because it was a time set aside to honor the nation's Civil War dead by decorating their graves.

The Civil War ended in 1865. Over 620,000 people had died, out of a population of only 32 million. Lost was a generation of sons, fathers, and husbands; daughters, mothers and wives.

The Spring of 1866 saw women in the South and North starting to decorate the graves of the lost loved ones. This spread.

On May 5, 1868, General John A. Logan of the Grand Army of the Republic, an organization of former sailors and soldiers, declared in General Order No. 11 that:
"The 30th of May, 1868, is designated for the purpose of strewing with flowers, or otherwise decorating the graves of comrades who died in defense of their country during the late rebellion, and whose bodies now lie in almost every city, village, and hamlet churchyard in the land... We should guard their graves with sacred vigilance... Let pleasant paths invite the coming and going of reverent visitors and fond mourners. Let no neglect, no ravages of time, testify to the present or to the coming generations that we have forgotten as a people the cost of a free and undivided republic."

Thus the first widely observed Decoration Day was held on May 30th, 1868, three years after the war had ended. The ceremonies were held oat the mourning draped veranda of Arlington Mansion, which was across the Potomac Rive from Washington D.C. it once was the home of Gen Robert E. Lee, and had been seized to become the Arlington National Cemetery. Gen. and Mrs Ulysses S. Grant and other Washington officials presided over a gathering of 5,000 of the living, surrounded by the tombstones of over 15,000 war dead.

The main speaker was General James Garfield (who later became president of the United States). "I am oppressed," Garfield said, "with a sense of the impropriety of uttering words on this occasion. If silence is ever golden, it must be here beside the graves of fifteen thousand men whose lives were more significant than speech and whose death was a poem the music of which can never be sung... We do not know one promise these men made; one pledge they gave; one word they spoke; but we do know they summed up and perfected by one supreme act the highest virtues of men and citizens. For love of country, they accepted death, and thus resolved all doubts and made immortal their patriotism and virtue."

After the speeches, children from the Soldiers' and Sailors' Orphan Home and members of the Grand Army of the Republic made their way through the cemetery, strewing flowers on both the Union and confederate graves, reciting prayers and singing hymns.

Garfield's eloquent expression of the national reverence for its heroes prompted similar Memorial Day observances all over the country. by the late 1800s, many communities across the country had begun to celebrate memorial Day and, after World War I, observances also began to honor those who had died in all of America's wars. In 1971, Congress declared Memorial Day a national holiday to be celebrated the last Monday in May. (Veterans Day, a day set aside to honor all veterans, living and dead, is celebrated each year on November 11.)

Memorial Day is now celebrated at Arlington National Cemetery with a ceremony in which a small American Flag is placed on each grave. Also, it is customary for the president or vice-president to give a speech honoring the contributions of the dead and lay a wreath at the Tomb of the Unknowns. About 5,000 people attend the ceremony annually. It is celebrated throughout the country at other cemeteries holding the dead of war. Parades are held, as are community picnics.

Memorial Day - - never Forget....Always honor.

Thus it is very appropriate that we not take for granted the supreme sacrifice so many have given...their lives...to preserve our American freedom

Suppressing the Truth

2009-04-15T13:23:00.002-06:00

We now live in a society where truth is being suppressed if people find it objectionable. This suppression of truth is not limited to what some would call political issues. It now applies to any area of life that someone finds the truth objectionable.

Three things in the past few weeks grabbed my attention.

· The first was the tragic earthquake in L’Aquila, Italy. Located about 65 miles from where we lived during our last assignment in the US Army, it is or was an incredibly beautiful old Italian town. Well worth the stop for anyone visiting Italy. The sad part of the story was that the earthquake was clearly predicted. According to one article, “Weeks before the disaster, an Italian scientist had predicted a major quake around L'Aquila, based on concentrations of radon gas around seismically active areas. Seismologist Gioacchino Giuliani was reported to police for "spreading alarm" and was forced to remove his findings from the Internet. Civil Protection reassured locals at the end of March that tremors being felt were "absolutely normal" for a seismic area.”[1] And now hundreds are dead.

· The second story was from the Wall Street Journal, which is known for accurate reporting. It stated that members of Congress had suppressed findings from a study that reported the success of the ‘Voucher System” for the majority of students involved. Unfortunately for the American educational system, far too members of Congress have lost any objectivity when it comes to education. In most cases they are listening only to the NEA which could lose a great deal of control of the educational process if a voucher system was adopted. The problem is not whether you agree or disagree with the voucher system. The problem is again, truth is suppressed when people find it opposite of their political views or in many cases with politicians who are told what they must believe. The future of more than Hundreds are dying everyday in our schools

· Now we come to the last issue…. Easter or more accurately “Resurrection Day” of our Lord and Savior, Jesus Christ. We live in a culture where many who would call themselves “Christians” have chosen to suppress The Truth of our Christian Faith. Jesus Lives!!! The Tomb is empty and we have real “Hope” instead of some hype. I do not fault the non-Christians for this tragic state. It has nothing to do with those who deny Christ. My sadness is for those who celebrate Christmas and Easter as Christians and then lie about Jesus the rest of the year. and we cannot even begin to calculate the numbers being lost to the lies while the truth is being suppressed by Christians saying that Jesus is not the only way to the Father. Many call Christians who believe this to be intolerant.

The answer is pretty simple. Those of us who believe that Jesus is the only way and the only truth, must lives our lives in such a manner that truth lives louder that the efforts to suppress it.

Perhaps, God wants our lives to speak louder than our words.

[1] The Associated Press and Reuters contributed to this report.
URL: http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/30061140/ MSN Privacy . Legal © 2009 MSNBC.com

Why I Am Passionate About Ministry to Men

2009-03-17T06:33:00.003-06:00

Last weekend I had the privilege of speaking to nearly 700 men as a part of the speaking team at the Iron Sharpens Iron conference in Rockford, IL. Roy Abbott and his team at Focal Point Ministries did a tremendous job of sponsoring/hosting this event.

For me to speak at this event, I spent a few hours on the road to and from the airport in Denver. I spent time in the airport waiting for flights or to get my bags. I spent nearly a total of three hours on a bus between Chicago and Rockford. It was not just me, by the way--many of the speakers/workshop leaders did the same thing. Here is the point. Lots of hours invested in this by many many men so that we could come together and build ourselves as well as other men. My close friends and brothers, Ray Morgan, Ken Larson, Dan Erickson and Sam Mehaffie had similar travel schedules to be there and invest in men.

So Why???

Here is a glimpse of my last four days from just one small perspective.

1. FRIDAY AFTERNOON: The young lady at the Information Desk was divorced because her husband had left her for another woman. As a note, he was divorcing that person now and had called her to see if this young lady would take him back. The young lady said that men these days are just weak and looking for a "Sugar Mama" to take care of them.

2. FRIDAY NIGHT: Our server was a great young lady. She was raising two children, ages 2 and 5 on her own. We prayed with her.

3. SUNDAY AFTERNOON: Our server when asked if we could pray for her, asked for prayer for her "ex" boyfriend. She said that he just needed help being a man and finding himself.

4. MONDAY LUNCH: My wife and I had lunch together and asked our server if we could pray for her. Without any hesitation she said yes and when asked if there is anything specific, she asked if we would pray for her family. She shared that her father had left her family about four years ago and they were still struggling, especially her two little brothers.

Here is my take on this-- we need stronger men. Ladies of all ages deserve much better than they are getting. Is this an indictment on all men in the land. Absolutely not!! I am meeting with guys across the land who are working hard to be the men God created us to be.

I am suggesting that there is still a great deal of work to be done.

So why do I do what I do and why does my bride of nearly 32 years support me beyond anything that would seem reasonable to others?? We have three of the most amazing Granddaughters (and who knows how many more in the future). They are being raised to be strong Godly ladies. I am working to see if we cannot help to raise some strong Godly men who will raise their sons or grandsons to be the kind of Godly men my granddaughters deserve.

Our families, churches, communities and our nation all need and deserve strong Godly Men.

That is why I am passionate about ministry to men and why I am heading to Springfield, IL this weekend.

Taking Ownership of the Promises

2009-03-10T12:39:00.008-06:00

When you try to read from a daily devotion, naturally there are are some that grab you more than others. For several years I have used the same devotion, Thoughts From the Diary of A Desperate Man. Prior to that, I used My Utmost for His Highest for several years.

This year I changed to Streams in the Desert, by L. B. Cowman. It was first published in 1925 and the author is really Mrs. Charles E. Cowman. I imagine in 1925 it was hard for a women to be taken serious many areas and she found greater receptivity as simply L. B. Cowman. I, for one, am very grateful that she had the courage to be obedient to what God had clearly placed on her heart.

In one of her devotions several weeks ago, she stated that when Joshua led God's people into the land of their inheritance, He gave them the boundaries of the land and also promised that where ever they placed their feet would be theirs. Unfortunately, they only occupied--took ownership of one-third of the land God laid out for them. Unbelievable.

My first thought upon being reminded of this was that

the Israelis are now and have been for many years

fighting on and for the land they did not occupy.

Since they did occupy what God had given them,

the enemy took possession of what

rightfully belonged to God's children.

I believe that God's promises are like his land. We have to take possession or ownership of them. Far too many people (me included) have spoken of the promises of God that he has given us but we have not taken possession of them and owned them.

As I thought about this, I wondered how many of us believe the promises but feel unworthy to receive them. As a result, we try to earn them or wait until we feel that we are worthy of such promises.

I now wonder how many of my promises are being occupied by the enemy because I did not take possession of them. So here is my decision. When God makes me a promise, I am going to claim it at that very moment. I refuse to give the enemy ownership of my promises.

How about you??

Dreaming By Day

2009-03-02T12:30:00.000-07:00

When I spoke at Lino Lakes, one of the things that God impressed on my heart to share with the men was how important it is to dream.

In the poem “Eleonora,” Edgar Allan Poe writes, “Those who dream by day are cognizant of many things which escape those who dream only by night.”

Here is my translation….. There are many who dream by night, but beware of those who dream by day for they are the dangerous ones who will change the world.

Do not confuse the issue of “daydreaming” with the ability and gift to dream by day. I find it exhilarating to dream by day when I know that the dreams are of God. One of the great things about real dreams is that I cannot do it without God. There are many things in life that we plan which in reality we can do without God--not that I want to do anything without Him. We have to remember that if our plans are totally achievable on our own, we have written God out of the equation. Every man needs to dream and dream of things that cannot be accomplished without God. When we are willing to risk dreaming those types of dreams, we are forced to keep God in everything.

In a devotion entitled, Streams in the Desert, L.B. Coleman told a great story. “The Marquis of Salisbury, an English statesman and diplomat, upon being criticized for his colonial policies, replied, ‘Gentlemen, get larger maps’.”

When we dream by day, it forces us to get bigger maps….. God-sized maps.

Now that is real dreaming! That is when men become truly dangerous--but dangerous in the right way for the right reasons.

Acts 2:17‘And it shall be in the last days,’ God says, ‘That I will pour forth of My Spirit on all mankind; And your sons and your daughters shall prophesy, And your young men shall see visions, And your old men shall dream dreams; [1]

[1]New American Standard Bible : 1995 update. 1995 (Ac 2:17). LaHabra, CA: The Lockman Foundation.

Making No Excuses

2009-02-25T07:09:00.004-07:00

Over the last few months I have had this nagging feeling that the longer I am a Christian the easier it is to forget the filth that God has forgiven me for and the sin He has delivered me from. I do not want to live in the past and dwell constantly on what God has brought from instead of focusing on where He is taking me to. Yet, I must always be mindful of what a great sinner I am and what an incredible Savior I have.

This past week I had the incredible privilege of being with some remarkable brothers in the Lord who are in prison in the Lino Lakes Confinement Facility (MN). I was again, as I was last year, humbled by their unashamed honesty. Unlike many Christians who when asked about the sins that God has forgiven, seem to glorify or downplay the magnitude of their sin... the men at Lino lakes in the InnerChange Freedom Initiative are just honest. http://www.ifiprison.org/site_hmpg.asp

They will tell you that they are guilty as charged and make no excuses. They will also tell you that they are paying a price for what they did but that Jesus has paid the ultimate price for them.

I left Lino Lakes very humbled after spending Thursday evening and all day Friday with nearly 170 men who are getting right in a place much different than where most of us live. They are getting it right under circumstances much more difficult than what most of us experience. They are getting it right when the odds are stacked against them instead of like most of us with the odds really in our favor if we want them to be.

If you ever needed to get recharged and or jump-started to quit making excuses and get on with living for the Lord, maybe you need to spend a day with my brothers at Lino Lakes.

They will not be able to read this because they are not allowed internet. But I want them to know I am proud to be called their brother.

George Washington's Thanksgiving Proclamation

2008-11-27T07:13:00.002-07:00

It is good for us to pause and remember that we are a nation founded "Under God."

On October 3, 1789, George Washington made the following proclamation and created the first Thanksgiving Day designated by the United States government

“ Whereas it is the duty of all Nations to acknowledge the providence of Almighty God, to obey his will, to be grateful for his benefits, and humbly to implore his protection and favor, and whereas both Houses of Congress have by their joint Committee requested me "to recommend to the People of the United States a day of public thanksgiving and prayer to be observed by acknowledging with grateful hearts the many signal favors of Almighty God especially by affording them an opportunity peaceably to establish a form of government for their safety and happiness.

Now therefore I do recommend and assign Thursday the 26th day of November next to be devoted by the People of these States to the service of that great and glorious Being, who is the beneficent Author of all the good that was, that is, or that will be. That we may then all unite in rendering unto him our sincere and humble thanks, for his kind care and protection of the People of this Country previous to their becoming a Nation, for the signal and manifold mercies, and the favorable interpositions of his providence, which we experienced in the course and conclusion of the late war, for the great degree of tranquility, union, and plenty, which we have since enjoyed, for the peaceable and rational manner, in which we have been enabled to establish constitutions of government for our safety and happiness, and particularly the national One now lately instituted, for the civil and religious liberty with which we are blessed; and the means we have of acquiring and diffusing useful knowledge; and in general for all the great and various favors which he hath been pleased to confer upon us.

And also that we may then unite in most humbly offering our prayers and supplications to the great Lord and Ruler of Nations and beseech him to pardon our national and other transgressions, to enable us all, whether in public or private stations, to perform our several and relative duties properly and punctually, to render our national government a blessing to all the people, by constantly being a Government of wise, just, and constitutional laws, discreetly and faithfully executed and obeyed, to protect and guide all Sovereigns and Nations (especially such as have shown kindness unto us) and to bless them with good government, peace, and concord. To promote the knowledge and practice of true religion and virtue, and the encrease of science among them and Us, and generally to grant unto all Mankind such a degree of temporal prosperity as he alone knows to be best.

Given under my hand at the City of New York the third day of October in the year of our Lord 1789.”

Muscle Memory

2008-11-22T09:42:00.001-07:00

Several weeks ago I completed a motorcycle training training course for experienced riders and passed all the certifications. Lots of fun to say the least. It was a glorious day and then to be outside (rather than inside at a desk) for nearly seven hours was incredible. Not to mention that the bulk of the time was spent riding a motorcycle.

Throughout the day our instructor set up various riding courses for us to practice specifics driving skills. Carol, was not only knowledgeable but she knew how to teach as well. There were several things about the day that were significant besides being outside on a motorcycle for the day.

First was that Carol demonstrated everything before we were required to accomplish it ourselves. Key to this was each time she grabbed a bike being used by one of the students. In other words she did what we had to do with the same equipment we had to use. I was impressed.

Another thing that really hit me at the time and I have spent a lot of time thinking about it since then. Carol said that we needed to develop "muscle memory." I had not heard that before. Over and over in every drill she continued to tell us how to develop "muscle memory."

Time and time again, Carol would "yell" at me (in the nicest of ways) to let my muscles memorize what I wanted them to do and then each time following the specific exercise would get easier. She was right. Imagine that.

But here is the deal for me. One I love riding and what she showed me really helped me.

Second thing is that the same principle applies to my spiritual life. If I want to get better and stronger, I must develop "spiritual" muscle memory. I must do the things necessary for me to help me remember the things of God beyond my morning devotional and times of study. I must let God train me to be the kind of person He wants me to be naturally.

I have a lot of work to do to be the kind of motorcyclist that I want to be and I have a lot more work to do to be the type of person God desires me to be.

Keep praying for me on both counts.

An Old Farmer's Advice

2008-11-20T07:23:00.004-07:00

I rarely just cut and paste onto the blog but I really thought this was too good not share. In the world we are living in today, it seems that perhaps simple words are really needed so I share these. My Uncle Bob was a Farmer and I think that I can hear him saying most of these to me at one time or another.

Have a great day and be blessed.

An Old Farmer's Advice:

* Your fences need to be horse-high, pig-tight, and bull-strong.

* Keep skunks and bankers and lawyers at a distance.

* Life is simpler when you plow around the stump.
* A bumble bee is considerably faster than a John Deere tractor.

* Words that soak into your ears are whispered...not yelled.

* Meanness don't jes' happen overnight.

* Forgive your enemies. It messes up their heads.

* Do not corner something that you know is meaner than you.

* It don't take a very big person to carry a grudge.

* You cannot unsay a cruel word.

* Every path has a few puddles.

* When you wallow with pigs, expect to get dirty.

* The best sermons are lived, not preached.

* Most of the stuff people worry about ain't never gonna happen, anyway.

* Don't judge folks by their relatives.

* Remember that silence is sometimes the best answer.

* Live a good, honorable life. Then when you get older and think back, you'll enjoy it a second time.

* Don't interfere with somethin' that ain't botherin' you none.

* Timing has a lot to do with the outcome of a rain dance.

* If you find yourself in a hole, the first thing to do is stop diggin'.

* Sometimes you get, and sometimes you get got.

* The biggest troublemaker you'll probably ever have to deal with, watches you from the mirror every mornin'.'

* Always drink upstream from the herd.

* Good judgment comes from experience, and a lotta that comes from bad judgment.

* Lettin' the cat outta the bag is a whole lot easier than puttin' it back in.

* If you get to thinkin' you'r e a person of some influence, try orderin' somebody else's dog around.

* Live simply. Love generously. Care deeply. Speak kindly.

*Leave the rest to God.

The Lost Boys

2008-09-20T07:05:00.003-06:00

The article was neatly tucked away in the September 8, 2008 edition of Newsweek. One would hardly notice because this particular edition was devoted to the covering the Republican Convention. Yet there it was.

Titled Why I Am Leaving Guyland Peter Pans aren't as happy as they seem. by a Tony Dokoupil. http://www.newsweek.com/id/156372 Dokoupil, a 27 year old who was married the week his article was published in Newsweek, gives us a disturbing look at the twenty-something male and his attitudes.

It is hard to pick out one sentence that is the most significant or powerful. Start with this one......Today's guys are perhaps the first downwardly mobile—and endlessly adolescent—generation of men in U.S. history.

The author tells us of a generation of guys who are lost in world of drinking, sex and meaningless relationships.

Once the preserve of whacked-out teens and college slackers, this testosterone-filled landscape is the new normal for American males until what used to be considered creeping middle age, according to the
sociologist Michael Kimmel. In his new book, "Guyland," the State University of New York at Stony Brook professor notes that the traditional markers of manhood—leaving home, getting an education, finding a partner, starting work and becoming a father—have moved downfield as the passage from adolescence to adulthood has evolved from "a transitional moment to a whole new stage of life."

What is the real issue in all of this? First of all there is far more to this problem than can be answered in a simple "one-liner."

If you have spent any time around me, you know that one of my "things" is this issue of "adolescence." Here we see it again. It is as if the author along with the rest of us including the church and most ministries are saying that a little adolescence is normal but a little can go a long way and it does not take very long before a little becomes way too much.

We have accepted this ludicrous man-invented idea of adolescence as a normal part of our lives and we are destroying our young men in the process.

Secondly, where are the older men....you know old guys like me.... to invest in the lives of these young guys long before they see life as one party after another and still let mom do your laundry. We need older men to start investing in young guys much younger than we are thinking that mentoring should start.

Now for those who wonder why is it all about the guys??? It is not. But we need to wake up and realize that when we raise up weak guys who have not grown into men, we are also putting the same generation of young ladies at risk.

We must raise up strong men and women who know who and whose they are in Christ. One sex does not grow stronger at the expense of the other.

The last point that really grabbed me was the statement that for guys in their 20's this is "the new normal."

I wrote about this very same issue of accepting the abnormal as normal and the issue of adolescence in my book, Men of Honor Women of Virtue. http://www.achosengeneration.org/

Men, it is past time for us to invest in younger men. While the situation is critical, it is not hopeless.

Who are you investing your life in today???

Praying for a Generation

2008-09-18T14:07:00.003-06:00

Today I met with Pastor Chase Hill, Student Ministries Pastor at Westside Baptist in Hutchinson, Kansas. First of all he is really a believer in the power of all generations and is looking at how to engage the other generations in the lives of his students.

As we talked he just casually mentioned that there was a team of prayer warriors....mostly seniors....who are praying during the entire time of the Rites of Passage. He told me that I would be able to "spot them." How I wondered??? Then he told me. He had this idea and with the help of one of the other pastors, he had distributed hospital wristbands with labels in them to remind the wearer to pray.

What a remarkable idea and clear reminder. he told me that they were the good ones and waterproof so they can be worn in showers or whatever. I was blown away. what a fabulous ideal to engage in a visible way a group to pray for the younger generation and specifically those participating in the Rites of Passage this weekend at Westside Baptist.

I am believing that this is going to be a fabulous weekend.

The Intergenerational Church

2008-09-17T03:31:00.006-06:00

I am a very blessed man. I know this and it is not a new revelation. Among the many blessings that God has poured out on me are my family, our ministry team, ACG Board and an incredible number of unbelievable friends that can be counted on regardless of the circumstances. The list is much longer than that but you get an idea of how blessed I am.

One of my great blessings is to have a church to call home and a Pastor who is one of my hero's. He is my Pastor.... but he is also my friend. He also shares my passion and the vision of A Chosen Generation to see the church as the Intergenerational family God intended for us to be.

Yesterday he wrote an article on his blog that we all need to read. It is titled....Helping our Youth Grow Strong. You can find it at: http://jimladd.blogspot.com/

Pastor Jim does not pretend to like all generations because he must as a Pastor... He has a heart and passion for ever generation.

In a few weeks, Grace Community Church will celebrate a new group of "young adults.' This is the fourth consecutive year for the Rites of Passage at Grace.

Pastor Jim does not support the Rites of Passage because he would hurt my feelings if he did not..... (You know how sensitive, fragile and easily hurt I am) ...... He does it because he is a true believer in the power of the Intergenerational Church.

There is such power in all generations working together as OneGeneration for the glory of God.

Jim, thanks for being my Pastor, friend and one of the guys I can count on in any battle.

.

Welcome Back, Bill

2008-09-16T08:07:00.004-06:00

From 1994 to 1997 I was on the staff of Promise Keepers. It was clearly an incredible experience. I often tell others that I received 10 years of ministry experience in 3 years. That is really not an exaggeration. During that time I had the privilege of meeting some amazing leaders and one of them was Coach Bill McCartney.

Granted, Bill and I did not see "eye to eye" on everything. After all he was the coach for the Colorado Buffalo's and I was, am and will always be a true football fan and cheer for our beloved Nebraska Cornhuskers.

The area that Bill and I did ...... and always will agree on is the need for men to be Godly men.

In the short time that I was on staff at PK, I got to know Bill as a ministry leader, man and friend. When I wrote the book, Men of Honor Women of Virtue, I included a story of Bill and our son Courtney. Here is an excerpt from the my book.......

"A Special Coach"
"In 1994 I joined the staff of Promise Keepers and had the privilege of meeting Bill McCartney, who was then still the head football coach at the University of Colorado. During my first few years on staff, Bill continued coaching and, as his schedule would permit, spoke at various PK events. I met him on several occasions, but it wasn’t until after he became the president of PK and worked from the national offices that I actually got to know him. On several occasions when I saw Bill, I had both my sons with me. And each time I gave them the opportunity to say hello to the man who had become my friend. What I didn’t realize was that, over time, they came to consider him their own friend. To this day, if they’re in the same location, they’ll seek him out and speak with him.
One Saturday morning in the spring of 1996 I took Chad and Courtney to the PK office with me. We were sitting in my office area when Bill walked by and said hello to all three of us. We talked for a few minutes, and then he continued on to his office. After a few minutes my younger son, Courtney, who was in sixth grade at the time, told me he was going to Coach’s office to talk to him about something. I was somewhat concerned because I knew Bill wasn’t coming to the office on a Saturday morning just to sit there and wait to see who stopped by to visit with him. Since I wanted to be respectful of his time, I cautioned Courtney not to stay too long. He looked back and gave me a smile, as if to say, “I’m going to see my friend—not yours.”
As time passed I became increasingly concerned, until Courtney finally came around the corner. He immediately asked me to stop by Bill’s office on Monday because Bill’s administrative assistant would have a package for him. Unaware of what had just transpired, I asked Courtney what I was going to be picking up for him. He looked at me and matter-of-factly said, “Coach is loaning me the jacket and hat he wore for the last college game he coached.”
I must have had a puzzled look on my face because Courtney (out of kindness) went on to explain that he was giving a book report at school on Coach’s autobiography, From Ashes to Glory. The teacher was requiring the students to dress the part of the person they had chosen as the subject of their book report. Bill McCartney was a major figure in Colorado at the time. He probably could have run for governor and been elected by a landslide. Imagine a sixth grader standing before his class and giving a report about the football coach who had led the Colorado Buffaloes to a national championship! Now imagine that sixth grader wearing the jacket and hat the coach had worn in his last game. I’m not sure Courtney even needed to give the book report! To say Bill McCartney was an encourager to my sons, and on this occasion specifically to my younger son, would be similar to announcing that the sun is hot."

It was with great joy that I saw that Bill was returning to Promise Keepers as the CEO and Chairman of the Board. http://www.promisekeepers.org/

Promise Keepers has been clearly used by God to touch men and change lives. I pray that God will continue to use PK to build Godly men..... Men who can be counted on and trusted by their families, communities and this nation.

Welcome back, Bill

A Son Returns Home

2008-09-13T04:14:00.003-06:00

On Thursday, we sat at one of our favorite restaurants and afterwards went to a Starbucks to just talk. In some ways it was as if he had not been gone since last Christmas, yet at the same time there was so much to catch up on.

He had not changed. I know that we often hear that being in the war, men come back changed. Yet, Courtney had not changed. Still the same guy .......but he was more mature as a result of what he saw. Don't get me wrong.....I think he was very mature before he left but clearly he had grown because of what he had seen and done.

He came back with a greater appreciation for other cultures. This is a guy born in Italy and has traveled. It is different living with other cultures and helping restore their dignity and freedom, than just visiting.

He came back with a renewed vision that each of us can make a difference.

From a dad, here is what I know....It is so great to have him home. I felt that God has blessed us with a pretty remarkable son. Billie and I prayed that God would protect him....but more than just protect..... we wanted God to use him mightily.

Here is what I also know....

1. There are some who are reading this who have lost a loved one. I cannot explain why some come home to us and others do not. But, my heart goes out to you and I pray that God will give you a peace that "passes all understanding."

2. There are some who have loved ones currently serving in dangerous places. I will continue to wear a yellow bracelet to remind me to pray for them.

3. The world is a dangerous place and if we have nothing deemed worth fighting and even dying for we probably have nothing worth living for.

Final thought: Billie and I are so very grateful for so many who prayed for Courtney and our family. Thank you.

Speaking for Christians or as a Christian

2008-09-01T10:12:00.006-06:00

It did not take the National Organization of Women (NOW) very long to issue a press release after Gov Sarah Palin was introduced as Sen John McCain's choice to be his VP running mate .

Before some of you start doing cartwheels and backflips that this is going to be a political statement, give it a rest and read on or go back to playing solitare on the computer.

Here is what caught me. According to NOW, "The fact that Palin is a mother of five who has a 4-month-old baby, a women who is juggling work and family responsibilities, will speak to many women. But will Palin speak FOR women? Based on her record and her stated postions, the answer is clearly No."

The press release went on to say....."Sen Joe Biden is the VP candidate who appeals to women,...."

So let me see if I have this right. Sarah Palin may speak AS A WOMAN BUT NOT FOR WOMEN. Joe Biden cannot SPEAK AS A WOMAN (I hope not but it has already been a pretty strange political year) BUT (according to NOW) HE DOES SPEAK FOR WOMEN.

Perhaps that is strange to some of us, but here is the real question.

WHO SPEAKS FOR CHRISTIANS?

Well, in case you are wondering, it is not me. Prior to writing this I checked my emails, phone messages and text messages; and there was not a single message from any major news organization asking me to speak for Christians.

So, since I am not the self-appointed or self-annointed spokesman for Christians, I am limited to SPEAKING AS A CHRISTIAN.

I really think that is what God has called every Christian to do including me--speak as a Christian-- but, not in the same manner some of us have thought we were called to speak.

I am thinking that the world needs to hear us speak with our hearts and actions.

It is going to be a pretty remarkable day when the news reports, "Well the Christians are certainly speaking with a very loud and clear voice." When asked what are they saying, the response comes back...."Saying? Are you kidding? Look at how these people live their lives."

I do not know who speaks for women in this campaign season.

For me, it is not important who speaks for Christians. Someone always seems to step up to the spotlight for that one.

The real question for me is not who is speaking for the Christians. My question is, "Do I speak, as a Christian in such a way that honors God?"

Final Thought: I really have a long way to go speaking as a Christian before I think anyone would trust me to speak for Christians.

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How Sunday School is Failing Our Boys

2008-08-30T10:49:00.006-06:00

This past week I received the latest email from Promise Keepers. In the recent months PK has been sending PK Man Rules with articles by Steve Sonderman and David Murrow. Both of these guys are friends and doing Kingdom work.

Steve's article was on Developing Leaders and is certainly worth a read. http://www.promisekeepers.org/home/email/pkmanrules-archive/0808_1

David Murrow wrote the second article titled, How Sunday School is Failing Our Boys. http://www.promisekeepers.org/home/email/pkmanrules-archive/0808_2

David made several good points about the need for our guys to win and spoke clearly to the issue that guys learn differently that our daughters. As a result teaching guys should be different than the techniques we use to teach our gals.

What was failed to be recognized in David's article is that we are really dealing with young men not boys.

Everything David stated was true. David has always done good research and continues to do so. This is not meant to shoot at a Christian brother or demean his writing and assessment. There is enough of that nonsense going on in the Christian community without me adding to it.

It is simply to say that there is more to to the issue. Churches and parents must consider who is defining "manhood" for our sons (womanhood for our daughters)?

If we leave this critical issue to the world, public schools and the marketing geniuses who are trying to reach our kids at earlier and earlier ages, we will lose them from more than Sunday School.

Davids' article nails the age perfectly-- "When does this winnowing start? In Sunday school. By age 13 we’ve already convinced a certain kind of boy that church is not for him."

At Age thirteen, we have a young man ----- not a boy.

Included in any conversation about the loss of our young men (and women) should be the issue of Rites of Passage into Godly adulthood. Without Rites of Passage, our sons are not leaving their faith or church-----they are just walking away from their parents' church and faith trying to find their own.

A faith of a child is the faith of their parents. An adult faith is their own. They cannot have an adult faith while still living in their parents home unless their adulthood is confirmed by their parents and the adult community of believers.

It was also great fun for me to read Davids' article because of the story of Burke Community Church. My family and I were members of BCC from 1989 to 1992. A wonderful church where we served, taught Sunday School and launched and ministry to the most unbelievable group of then 5th and 6th graders, called Children of Light.

Hats off to Steve and David for their articles this month.

for more information on Rites of Passage see A Chosen Generation at http://www.achosengeneration.org/

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